What did the kid with cancer get for Christmas? A visit from the Make a Wish Foundation and the opportunity to see her favorite band in concert. Unfortunately, she was very ill from the chemotherapy, and was unable to really enjoy herself at the concert. She passed away several days later, surrounded by family and friends.

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Q: What's annoying and doesn't smoke? A: AIDS

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What's worse than losing your job? 9/11

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What did the little boy find when he came home from school? His mother hanging from a tree.

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Your mom is so fat, her pants are starting to get tight.

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How do you check that you are not dreaming, but in actual fact, you are wide awake? Try to bite off our finger (this is actually possible, but the brain does not allow you to do it).

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a schizophrenic, and so am I.

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Why did the man go to Chinatown? Because he was hungry.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was deaf and blind.

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Why did sally fall of the swing? She didn't have any arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Why did Hitler cross the road? To get to the other side.

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A Mexican and a black person both jump off a bridge, who hits the water first? Neither, as all matter falls at the same rate, regardless of weight, size, or ethnicity.

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What did the alcoholic do when he finished his beer? Opened another one.

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What do you call a black guy driving a plane? A pilot.

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A businessman walks out of a store with his new haircut he was bald.

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A man was driving to work when he realized he hadn't told his wife happy anniversary. He turned the car around to head back home only to remember that their anniversary was on Friday, not Thursday. The man shared some nervous laughter with himself as the radio played in the background. He continued on toward work and had a run of the mill day meeting with potential clients.

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Women's rights

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knock knock. who's there? I am. I am who? I am pregnant

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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Because he's dead

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How many gays does it take to turn a lightbulb? 1

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Q:Whats the difference between a dead dog and a dead baby? A:The dog has skidmarks in front of it -RDV

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Q: Why did the girl fall of her swing? A: She was hit by a rogue fridge. Q: Why didn't she get back up? A: She was quite badly injured.

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What is long, erect, and 12 inches long? A ruler.

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1 + 1 = 11 Just kidding, it's 2 you moron.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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