How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way. ernkso

I was going to type an anti-joke but I totally forgot how it starts. It goes something like something something something something something your mom's a whore.

What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas many gift card to stores he liked

my friend got in a car wreck,he lost his left arm and left leg. how is he now? Hes all right.

Why don't you make like a tree, and get out of here.

What did one muffin say to the other Muffin? Nothing, muffins have no method of communication in any way shape or form

eh

Yar! What be a pirate's favorite football team? The Steelers. I'm originally from Pittsburgh.

A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

I never made a mistake. I thought i did once but i was mistaken

what does the doctor do when he tells you you have aids? he laughs and says "hahahahahhaha sucks for you, i dont!"

Why did the chicken cross the road? ... it wanted to cross the road.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

it was 3 am in the morning and i was stopped by 2 black men in an alley. we said hey to eachother and went along

ha ha, I can talk and you can't.

what do you call an evening with richard? a waste of time

What happened to the black man when he was hit by a truck? He died.

what do you call a bunch of crap at the bottom of the ocean? A shitwreck!

What does Michael have in common with NASA? Not a lot.

How many women does it take to changed a light bulb? 12. 11 to form a committee and 1 to make her boyfriend do it.

Hollywood presents: In a world... Where darkness and crime is at every corner... The governments darkest secret... MUST... BE... UNLEASHED! Jack Kirby: So, with this technology I can swallow criminals and gain their abilities? But is there not a lot wrong with this? Hollywood: Meh... Sorry, we are gonna go with The Fast and The Furious 64: Mario Kart style.

School is like a boner. It is long and hard unless your asian.

what did hitler say when the allies invaded germany i did NAZI that coming

Why didn't Cheryl's mother recognize her when she was wearing a blue shirt and jeans? Because Cheryl's mother has Alzheimer's.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...