How do you get a black man out of a tree? Politely say "Hey you, get out of the tree."

whats the same about a donkey and a horse? They are from the same animal classification group.

Billy: Why do pirates say rrrrr? Mark: I don't know, I'm not a pirate.

What does a squirrel get when it rains? It gets wet.

KEVIN CRUMMY SMELLS LIKE SARAHS (I)

Feminine hygiene jokes aren't funny. Period

Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

A horse walks into a bar. The barman says 'who the f*ck let a horse in here, get it out now'.

Why was the boy seeing stars? It was night time.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side Why did the duck cross the road? I don't know. I only know why the chicken crossed the road.

what is the best way to start a car? put in the key and turn it.

why was 6 afraid of 7? because seven is a murdering sociopath

What's worse than a dead baby joke? A dead baby.

Why did the father leave work early on his son's birthday? He was rushed to the hospital after facing a severe heart attack due to a history of cardiovascular disease in his family.

Three Kids dressed as a bear, a chicken, and a penguin walk into a bar. The bartender asks the to leave as they are all under the legal drinking age.

Knock Knock Who's there? Gilbert Gilbert who? Goddamn it David just open the door

A man walks into a bar, he realizes his mistake and walks into the dentist next door where he had made an appointment to get his teeth cleaned.

How many children does it take to kill a homocidal killer? None. Children should not attempt such a dangerous task.

Q: Why is grass green? A: I painted it.

Whats sad about 6 mexicans driving off a cliff in an escalade? An escalade sits 7 people.

Stalin and Hitler went to Kmart to buy mini-toothpaste. Because they schleifen schlafanned on their way to the country club.

Whats a black and white and red all over? i dont know...who spends their time researching this kind of stuff

What does a homeless guy do when he's hungry ? Nothing, he has no food.

why did the kid strike out in baseball he had leprosy and his arms were amputated

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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