How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? Depends on how hard you throw them.

How many Babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends how hard you throw them

what is black and white and read all over? a bankrupt newspaper that cannot afford color ink because the accountant misplaced company funds.

If you spell "ChuckNorris" in scrabble, you get 22 points.

What's worse than getting dumped? Heart Failure.

Why did the kid lay down? Because his legs were chopped off

What did the dog say to the Jewish Rabbi? Bark

What do you call a midget driving a train? A conductor

What is the leading cause of death? - Dying.

I was hungrey then i saw a man puke. Im still very hungrey. Then i threw up. Im not so hungrey

Why did the black man go to jail? He stole some rice.

Timmy needed to use the restroom in class, so he raised his hand and asked, "Can I go use the restroom?". The teacher said " I don't know, CAN you?" Timmy said, "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was black.

What did Marsha say when she ate the apple pie? Nothing. It would be rude for her to talk with her mouth full.

Where did Tommy go after the bomb went off? Everywhere

What's green, little, and eats rocks? A Little Green Rock-Eater What's green and has a thousand wheels? A lawn, I lied about the wheels! If I were to throw a rock down the a whole in the center of the earth (straight through) what would happen? The Little Green Rock-Eater would eat it!

Is this the Krusty Krab? Nope, Chuck Testa.

- Why does a kid from Chernobyl have two heads? - Because of the effects of the nuclear disaster that occurred there in 1986.

A man and a bird are on the edge of a cliff. The man falls off and dies and the bird flies away because birds can fly and people can't.

Jimmy: I'm like hey, what's up, hello. Jon: I've already met you.

What is green and red and flies 100 miles an hour? Super Frog.

Showcasing you? Really? I am tired too, yeah its daytime here as well, sleep well then. Hey, by the way, when you where like posting a lot of weird comments, where you trying to impress me?

"The only thing worse than being talked about is getting AIDS." -Oscar Wilde

jack and jill went up the hill to get a bucket of water. jack fell down and broke his ankle and neck severely. jack and jill were taken away from their parents by child services, and their parents are charged for child endangerment and child labor.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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