A kid is stuck in a fire, his dad (a firefighter) comes and saves him. Sadly the kid needed surgery from the fire. He went to the hospital and when the doctor looked at him he said "I cannot operate on my own son." How can this be? His parents are gay...

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fhfhfjjil;tyjgfkileg ryj ftrgndfhuiltyjgn

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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what did the robber say to lady gaga to get her in the car?get in the car or i shoot you i just want your money!!

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A successful, articulate, charming, well mannered, rich, young man walks into a bar.... Every night

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Q: Why does it take three Polacks to change a light bulb? A: Because they're so damn stupid.

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What do you call a Mexican in the sand? A churro! (not trying to be racist, I'm even Mexican)

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Q. Why did the lady scream when she saw her husband? A. Because he was dead.

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What's the difference between your momma and a bucket of shit? Well, for starters your mother and a bucket of shit aren't even made of the same physical structure, and secondly, your mother is sentient while a bucket is not.

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Dennis: you can make anything out of coppersulfate Austin: But copper sulfate can make things out of you

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Q: What Did Alakazam Use To Listen Gangnam Style? A: He Used Psybeam.

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Bill: My brother died on 9/11 Steve: Oh, I'm so sorry to hear that. Was he in one of the towers? Bill: Both. Steve: Both? Bill: Well, he was in the first tower when the first plane hit, so he ran over warn everybody in the second tower. While he was in the second tower, he died of AIDS. Steve: LOL! Bill: Quit your laughing, Steve, and make sweet, sweet love to me! Steve: It would be my pleasure! (While Bill and Steve made sweet, sweet love on a park bench, little did they know that a hundred miles away in a beautiful Los Angeles home, actor Jeff Goldblum was making himself a turkey sandwich with extra mayonnaise)

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On September 11th 2001, A worker of North twin tower man woke up to find his dog had chewed on his brand new phone. He went down stairs and realized his kitchen window had been broken. Getting ready to leave for work and saw his radio had been stolen out of his car. After finally making it to work and settling down in his office he spilled coffee on his lap. Enraged, the man yelled, "How could today get any worse!?"

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I wanted tobe cool, But I look like you

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Bride: "He went to Jared's!!! Ex: "But every Kiss Begins with Kay...."

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yo momma so fat, it appears she has two chins

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What happend to the girl who went to school dreased ugly She took the other students advice and whent home and killed her self

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^ That's not even funny ^

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Whats the difference between a black bird and a white bird? Their colour

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Have you seen the blind man's new house? No. Neither has he.

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What's the difference between a battered woman and a regular woman. There is absolutely no difference...

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How do u kill a black man You don't or else u will get intouble for murder but u can if u want there r many ways

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a blond goes into a taxi, the driver asks where to my friend , the blond says her desired location, gets droped off and trips, falls on her head, suffers major injuries, dies,weeks later the taxi driver drove the family to the funeral, they walk out and one of of them trips and gets back up...

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What did the traffic light say to the car? Bye.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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