What's long and black? A long and black object.

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a cat gets mauled by a dog. it died later that day

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Why is 6 scared of 9? Because 9 is a zombie.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? No eye deer

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead get pulled over. The cop says "Yuck!" Then shoots the redhead because red hair is disgusting.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Dog. Dog who? I have a dog.

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Q: What did the Rabbi say to the butcher? A: "Do you have the time?"

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Micheal Curran...that is all.

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Why was the plumber sad? Because his whole family died in a plane crash.

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Your momma is so fat when she heard about the quater pounder she thought it was for a quarter.

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The last head of Satan, is oh but what you blamed upon Your faults, Your sins. The thoughts of Madness written here, yet potent enough to cloud Your thoughts.... Wait not forever children of man, as eternity is at its peak, the false prophet IS AMONGST US! But what side is he on? The last ditch attempt to protect humanity from a raging jealous vengeful God? Say it is not so! Say that darkness is not the only thing standing against you and eternal damnation... ...Yet you killed his only true child, you stole his name, his essence... Even his Identity... ...Even the Angels white are powerless to stop him, Your maker, Your true maker, for what is the grief of the holy, from which you took his only son... ...As you celebrate once and once anew... :...Merry CHRISTmas, to all of those of you all now left behind... Celebrate it well, as before the world reaches 2017, is where it all ends...

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Nice ass. Too bad it's cracked in the middle, though.

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How do you stop a baby falling down a well? Throw a javelin through its forehead.

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How did the boys sunglasses fall off his face? He was drop kicked.

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How many filthy niggers does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, because I killed off all the filthy niggers.

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Why did the cop stop a black guy with a Rolls-Royce? Because he was speeding while on his phone and going through red traffic lights.

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What's the difference between Batman and a black guy? One is a guy that dresses up like a bat and fights crime and the other is just a mild-mannered person.

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What do you call a horny blond on the corner? A prostitute

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How did the mexican cross the border? He went through border patroll, and then later became a legal citizen of North America

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Why can't Osama bin Laden make anymore terrorist attacks? He's dead.

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Knock knock... Home invasion

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How do you get free money? Hire a black man to rob a bank.

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why was the boys t.v broken? because he through it out the window

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because goats lay eggs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops