Help me I need to know how to cook a human fetus by tomorrow does anyone know any good recipes?

do you like hardcore music? ya i love brokencyde

God, you know after creating humanity and kinda regretting it and stuff, fell into drinking and betting. He found Sin a fellow poker player, and all was good. Until God, drinking a bit too much bet a bit too many of his creds: Son. Jesus: Yes father. God: Uh, I kinda ended up low on cash on the poker game last night and I kinda well... I am gonna be frank here, I bet you and lost. NeroMetal Not dissing the bible, just enjoying the always brighter side of life eh? ;)

Relax, close down the place, he wont get very far. The rest of you better stay inside, and I promise you will all remain safe and secure.

What happens when a toad is struck by lightning? The same thing that happens to everything else.

Yo momma so fat, when she turns around, people give her a welcome back party!

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was tired of hearing that joke

Hej Erik och Leo!!

Why did the chicken cross the road. grass was greener on the other side!

Q:what do you call someone who spends 7 hours a day playing video games? A: Someone who takes pride and joy from gaming

What's the difference between acne and Michael Jackson? One is a an unsightly blemish that appears on your skin and the other is a dead pop singer.

How do u kill a black man You don't or else u will get intouble for murder but u can if u want there r many ways

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? AIDS

What did the Mexican guy say to the black guy? What? Nothing, he don't speak English

Why did Billy fall off the tree? Why? Because he had no arms or legs. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Billy

A poor woodcutter accidentally dropped his axe into the nearby river when taking a particularly forceful swipe at the tree he was cutting. He felt so dejected he wept. Then, the goddess of the river appeared. "What ails thee, my dear man?" she asked. "My axe -- it fell in the river!" stuttered the weeping woodcutter. "Do not worryI am the goddess of this river, and will find your axe!" said the River Goddess and dived into the river. After waiting eagerly for several minutes, the woodcutter was resigned to the fact that he had imagined the River Goddess.

What did a boy dying from cancer get for Christmas? The news that his cancer progressed and he would soon die. He underwent a surgery that got rid of the cancer and he was cured. He ran out of the hospital in excitement and got hit by a bus. He recovered slowly, but lived. By this time it was June and his birthday, he returned to school later that year. He got called fat and committed suicide.

An apple a day keeps the doctor away? What about the vampires?

Why did the skeleton not go to the party? Because without the aid of various ligaments and muscles that would be attached to the average human being's skeleton, he was not able to move himself so much as an inch.

What did the fat man say when he saw the giant twinky on the billboard? I wish that twinky was real, because I am too poor to pay my bills, am getting audited, and cannot feed my four children on minimum wage.

what's the only thing worse than losing a pen before a test? getting raped by a pedifile. -teagan doherty-

Roses are red Violets are blue Im bad with colours Nice T!ts

why was the mother sad? her sons school was bombed by terrorists. there we no survivors

why did Helen Keller's dog commit suicide? you would too if your name was uuhuhuhduhh

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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