Why did the groom have cold feet? Because his socks were slightly damp resulting in evaporation and the cooling of his feet, as well as the cold weather in December.

thumb_up thumb_down +51

Why did the woman die? She was hit by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

A bear walks into a bar. Mauls every one in it, then is shot to death by animal control.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Why is one side of a geese formation heading south always longer than the other? It has more geese

thumb_up thumb_down +45

you know what sucks more than getting raped by a gorilla? getting raped by two gorillas.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

husband; do you come here often wife: i live here

thumb_up thumb_down +43

What's red and silly? A blood clot

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Jesus said unto John, "Come forth and receive eternal life." But, John came fifth and won a toaster.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

What happened when a gay man asked a straight man what time it was? He told him the correct time, they parted ways and went about with their lives.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

A guy walks into a bar. He order three drinks and hands them to the lady behind him. It's because she is an alcoholic.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

what did the black kid get for Christmas? your bike

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Yo mamma is so hairy that she had to shave

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Q: What did the Miracle Whip say when the refrigerator door was opened? A: Nothing. Miracle Whip cannot speak.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What do you call a man with no legs? A paraplegic.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

I once bought a pack of batteries but they weren't included.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

So I went to the airport the other day, and the new TSA regulations are very strict.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Three blondes were stuck on an island, one of them wished for a motorboat, later on they all died of starvation

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Whats black, white, and huge? The world if you are a dog.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Why did sally fall of the swing? She didn't have any arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Why did Jack and Jill fall down the hill? Because they were donuts

thumb_up thumb_down +33

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender jokingly asks him, "Why the long face?!" The horse replies, "I was just diagnosed with cancer."

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Who was the dinosaurs favorite NBA player? He didnt have one. Dinosaurs became extinct far before the NBA was established.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Robin, get into the Batmobile.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Jess Burns

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops