Why did the accountant die?A terrorist put a bomb under his desk.

What do you call two Muslims flying an airplane? Pilots

Can you spot the polar bear Probably not because global warming killed it

an 80 yr old man apllies to walmart

What did John say to Tim Hi I'm John

What color do you wear if you're in the NAVY? Beige, white, sometimes camouflage - really, it depends on your rank and the situation.

You ask your friend if they want to hear a joke when they say yes tell them that thought you had a joke

What happened to Jillian when she walked out the door? She got hit by a bus A. Knock knock B. Whos there? A. Not Jillian

What's white and black and red all over A nun with a spear throug her head

What's the difference between a police officer and a green dinosaur? They both aren't cabbages.

What happened when Mark's hair died? He got depressed that he was growing old and the signs of it were showing.

Why is Joel always with Jamie? Because her incorrectly positioned eyes prevent her from seeing the true Joel.

What's the one game that black people are good at? Flashlight tag.

My Friend Philip had his lip removed today. he is just Phil now.

Knock Knock Who's there? Who Who who? Hoodini

What's red and fun to drink through a bendy straw? Period blood

How do you take a shit?, by taking it to go.

69

Why did Sally fall off the tree? Because Sally weighed 500 lbs and it was a bamboo tree.

Why can't you fit 100 oranges in a bathtub? Because motorcycles don't have doors

alex and clayton are having sex at school. at that point, their teacher walks in and tells clayton about the dangers of unprotected sex.

Q. What happened to the girl who locked her keys in her car? A. I raped her.

What did Michael Jackson say to the little boys before they came to his house? Get on the ferris wheel

What kind of king has 2 heads? A card!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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