There was an old lady who swallowed a fly. But everything turned out alright, as the fly was dissolved by stomach acid.

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knock knock come in

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How many blondes can you fit in a car? About 5 if you lift the arm rest.

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What is an offensive way to refer to black people from the time of the Flint Stones? Niggers

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What's the difference between dead babies and punching bag? No one makes jokes about punching bags.

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What's purple and has four legs? I don't know. What? I DONT KNOW EITHER THAT'S WHY I'M ASKING YOU IN THE FIRST PLACE!

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What's worse than 10 babies in a trashcan? One baby in 10 trashcans.

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caoimhin is a dorty carrot

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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What's the difference between an alien and Obama? - Nothing they are both aliens.

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What do you call a fish without an eye? A fsh

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A man walks in to a bar, remembering he was actually going to the hardware store, he heads out and leave.

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Whats worse then a worm in your apple This joke

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What is your name? My name is Jeff

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What happens when you Shoot a guy with a red Shirt On? He Dies.

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how do you keep an idiot in suspense. I dont' know he still hasn't told me

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Why did the boy get his head slammed in a car door? Because his mother did not love him, and thought it was an appropiate action.

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My former roomate had that game, about some bald guy that can slow down time, but thats like supernatural or something.

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whats worse than getting hit whit a baseball? getting hit by a train

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what do 9 out of 10 people enjoy?............Gangrape

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there's a worm in my lime at least it doesn't have scurvy

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A monkfish walks into a bar... The world blew up

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Why was Billy lat to school? He was being raped.

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what is black and white and red all over? a group of people of mixed races playing paintball.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops