What's the difference between a hipster and a steaming pile of shit? Many things.

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why don't asians use this finger (point at pinky)? because it's my finger.

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So, a monkey walks ino a bar... I can't remember the rest of the joke, but your mother is a whore.

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Q: What's worse than losing your job? A: Seeing your entire family die in a car accident

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Brother: Where is my Guitar? Me: To the Left to The left Brother : No its not Me: Everything you own in the box to the to the left Brother : Im telling Mom Me: In the Closet Thats my stuff and if i bought please don't touch Brother: *Opens Closet* This is all Mine! Me: *Takes off headphones*? Huh? Brother: Nevermind - _ -

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What is striped black and white? A prisoner in jail arrested for the murder and rape of a 7 year old child.

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steve walked into a bar, what happened next? A: He fell down.

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What do gay horses eat? Horse dick.

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mary poppins' handbag is full of fuckin dick

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A Jew, a Christian and a Muslim are on a plane to France. When they arrive in Paris one will go visit a friend who recently found inspiration in the many magical streets of the city and is in the middle of a year abroad. Another will search for a job and home to support himself and any future family that he might choose to have in the future. The last will check into a hotel and proceed to have a wonderful time seeing all the sights that Paris has to offer.

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Why did Gina laugh? Because something was funny.

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So I want to write an Anti-Joke, so I go to the write your own tab and see in the security code box: Which one is a country- fried rice or fried chicken. C'mon, it's definitely fried rice.

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hes climbing in your window, hes snatching your people up. Hes a fireman.

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A lawyer walks into a bar, and due to the repercussions of severe head trauma was never able to do so again.

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An old jew, an irish man, and a young mexican woman in her mid 20's are on an island. They eventually become hungry to a extremely ravishing extent. The jew cries out: "I can't take the thought of consuming man, because I am only allowed to consume kosher" The Mexican says: "Alright" The Irishman says: "O.K. Until then lets head over to Timilio's... I hear they are a fine establishment and also serve Kosher meals."

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she was deaf and blind, which both make it very unsafe for her to drive.

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Why did the black man lose his leg? Because he was kidnapped and tortured.

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Hey babe, do you like water, because I have water.

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Why did the cave men discover fire? They were the only humans on earth.

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What is the difference between a Jew and pizza? Pizza does not scream when it goes in the oven.

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Knock knock Who's there Done Done who? Done with waiting out here, let me in you dick!

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Wha do you call a couple with aids? 2 pepole who need immediate health treatment.

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your know what grinds my gears? when I throw my car into park while going 90 on the highway.

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Why does the fat kid no longer have friends? He died after falling out of a tree.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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