A horse walks into a bar and sits down on a stool. He orders a beer. He drinks his beer and leaves. Life continues on as it was.

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why did little suzy fall off the swing? she was stabbed by a drugaddict

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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How long does it take jimmy hoffa to screw in a light bulb? A: Jimmy Hoffa is dead and incapable of screwing in a light bulb, however if you change the tense of the question to "how long WOULD Jimmy Hoffa HAVE TAKEN to screw in a light bulb" then the approximate answer would be around 1 1/2 minutes if Mr Hoffa had proper dexterity an motor control that was comparable to the average human.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Boy Scout? Boy Scouts come back from camp.

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Whats the difference between a black guy at the beach, and a black guy at the zoo? One is at the beach, and one is at the zoo.

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What happened when the princess kissed a frog. Warts, all over her lips

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what do you get when you you put a knife in a head? a dead body

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Why was the Saudi Arabian terrorist flying a plane in America? He was going to visit some family on a ranch in Kansas.

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Roses are yellow, Violets are purple, im not color blind you just cant read.

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What did the paraplegic say when he walked? Nothing, paraplegics can't walk.

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How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? With teamwork and coordination, each could place one foot on the seat, and they can all stand up using each other for balance and support. The fact that they are gay in unimportant.

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What do you call three black guys in a bar? A bar.

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What do you call a black man wearing tights? Rick

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Whats worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. Whats worse than two bee stings? Three bee stings. Whats worse than three bee stings? The holocaust. Whats worse then the holocaust? Four bee stings.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? I'm a talking banana; what more do you want from me?

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What did one lawyer say to the other? Your son's coming to my son's birthday party, right?

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Fire extinguisher? One puts out a fire the other one fuels it.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Why did the father and his son drop their cola? Because a meteor hit and killed all life on Planet Earth.

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how do women get from the kitchen to the bedroom? they walk there.

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An elephant walks into a bar. Several people are trampled.

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I like my women like I like my coffee... In a cup.

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Boy: "But I don't wanna visit Grandma!" Mother: "Shut up and keep digging."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops