What's small and doesn't turn girls on? A bottlecap.

A man stumbles into a bar and yells, "Let's get wa-" and falls to the floor dead. The forensic scientists preform an autopsy and find that after 15 years of achoholism and depression caused his heart to stop beating. His family may have mourned his loss, if he had not left them penniless after killing his wife.

What did George Washington say to his men before crossing the Delaware River? "Men, we're crossing the Delaware River."

What's easier than taking candy from a baby? Almost nothing.

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? the holocaust

What did the Black women tell her Asian boyfriend in bed Nothing because they don't talk when they are sleeping

why did the man fall off his bike? someone threw an oven at him

Why did Mary fall off the swings? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock, Whos there, Not Mary

a gay man walks into a bar the bartender says "what'll it be today" he asks for a beer the bartender comes back with a beer because thats what he asked for.

An englishman, a german and a ginger are in a band. they play some creative music that some people may find enjoyable to listen to and would like to purchase a track.

What's fat, round and bounces on the ground? A ball. I lied about the fat bit.

knock knock. who's there? doctor. doctor who? doctor: you have cancer.

What did one viking say to the other viking? I don't know, it was in Danish

Cripples are lame.

Santa and smart blond jump off a building who lands frost none nethither exist

why does stuart own alot of hollister because he is autistic

What's green and can dance? A Cloud. I lied.

Is your refrigerator running? Yes. Okay

What's worse than finding out your friend is gay? Being gang-raped.

What does DNA stand for? National Dyslexic Assosiation.

Why did the chicken croos the road? It didnt, my father caught him and cooked him for dinner.

What is green and red all over? A christmas tree that is internally bleading.

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

what lies in ore an develops a golden tan ken bigleys body

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...