What's long, hard and full of seamen? A submarine.

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james schmitt whats your last name

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Everyone lies about agreeing to the terms of service... look, I'll do it right now! because i have to click it in order to post the joke.

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An Irishman walks into a bar and orders a Coke.

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Why did the plain crash? Because the pilot was a bagel.

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What's the difference of a team of black people and a pile of shit? None. Kelvin Yang.

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a priest, a bishop and a cardinal walk into bar to hand out pamphlets about alcoholism

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You know what happens when you assume. You jump to a conclusion that could conceivably have severe consequences.

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A rat scurries into a bar. Six days later, all of the people in that bar die of bubonic plague.

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What's worse than losing your job? 9/11

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you know what sucks more than getting raped by a gorilla? getting raped by two gorillas.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I suck at poems, nice tits

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A gay guy walks into a bar. Nothing is said to him, because homosexuality is accepted in this area.

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There once was a man from Peru who dreamed he was eating his shoe he woke with a fright, in the middle of the night and then went back to sleep

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Thousands upon thousands upon thousands of dying infants.

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How did sally fall off the swings? she had no arms. Knock knock, who is there? Not sally.

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So what happened after 911?? What do you think?

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Want to hear a joke? Jerry Sandusky's innocence

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Three blind mice walk into a bar, but they are unaware of their surroundings so to derive humour from it would be exploitative

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A Black man walks out of a KFC.

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roses are red, violets are blue, I suck at rimes, refridgerator.

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Yo' momma's so fat that when she steps on the scales the number seen to appear is proportionately larger than that seen to appear when the average human steps on them.

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Anti jokes are funny

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So Lindsay Lohan walks into a jewelry store. She buys a $2,500 necklace and goes on her way.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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