chuck norris is a little b|tch

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What do you call a dinosaur with no teeth? He's British

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was being chased by a predator and crossing the road led it away from it's pursuer.

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In the future... "Hey Apple! Hey, hey Apple!" "What the heck, Orange! You've been doing this for the last 10 billion years!"

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A black guy, mexican, and asian walk into a bar. They leave soon after because they heard the "one about them"

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Patient: "Doctor, I've got a strawberry stuck up my bum." Doctor: "I've got some cream for that."

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What's bigger than your penis? The Empire State Building.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Japan

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What happened to the blonde who blew out her birthday candles? Her hair caught on fire

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The Aristocrats

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Q: What is Paul's nickname A: His name is Paul, he doesn't need a nickname

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Woman : Child,what time is it? Child : I'm not a kid, I Broccoli.

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Roses are shit Violets are my dick Guess what I do for a living? Sex with refrigerator monkeys!

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Is Carly smart? No.

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Womens rights.

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whats funny and has four wheels? A handicapped 11 year old boy getting raped by his father

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Why are african american people better than caucasian people at sports like basketball? Because african american people have more high-twitch muscle fibers. Which allow them to perform Explosion type movements better than caucasian people.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? Depends on how hard you throw them.

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In soviet Russia... there is a distinct probability that you will get mugged due to the high crime rate and gang ruled streets.

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Three black men go to the basketball courts one day hoping to play some ball. On the way there they see a homeless man with a sign that says "Homeless. Anything will help." However, since they were on there way to play ball, none of them found it necessary to bring cash, thus resulting in them walking by the homeless man without giving him any money.

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What is black blue and screaming? Your daughter when i kicked the shit out of her

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A lady in a bank was asked by the clerk to round the sum she wanted to raise from her account. She rounded it several times, but the clerk continued to insist that the sum needs to be rounded. She left the bank confused, with a coupon consisting of completely rounded sum of 691, 88$. Next day she returned with a coupon with a rounded sum of 690,88$. The clerk asked again the lady to round the sum. The lady started helplessly to cry and said she had rounded is already with a harp, and couldn't make it round anymore, she even removed the sharp 1 from the sum.

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Have you heard the one about the drunk cleaning lady? I haven't either but I bet it is good. That is a pretty good premise for a joke.

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Everyone lies about agreeing to the terms of service... look, I'll do it right now! because i have to click it in order to post the joke.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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