What did the boy with no arms and legs get for his birthday? Nothing, he doesn't have the ability to open a present.

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Why did the Egg turn Purple Because it didnt turn blue.

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Q: Why did the Jew have to go to a concentration camp? A: Because he was Jewish

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Your mom is so old, that when somebody told her to act her age, she died.

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What did the piano say to the ice cube? Dude, get back in the freezer or you are going to melt!

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Q.Whats the difference between a trampoline and a pile of dead babies? A. I don't were my cleats on my trampoline.

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What did the bartender say to the man? can i have a beer if you dont get it the bartender asked the customer for a beer

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What would you call the flinstones if they were black? Ni**gers

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How do you make Yoda sad? Kill all of his friends.

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Q: How did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: It was dead Q: How did the second monkey fall out of the tree? A: It was taped on to the first one!

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Q: What does a bunny and a plum have in common? A: They're both purple except the bunny.

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Why did 5 members of the Al-Qaeda walk into the bank? To make 5 seperate cash withdrawals

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Why doesn't Micheal Jackson do a music video with Usher? Because he is dead.

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what do you say to a woman on her rags? nothing.try and ignore it.you didn't hear this from me and we never talked.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I just shot up a plaground Now Im heading to an orphanage

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Why don't black people listen to country music Because every time they here hoe down the think there wife just got shot No sorry for anybody who's black I luv ya don't think twice I have thirty blk friends

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Did you hear about the constipated mathematician who broke his calculator? He went to the shops and bought some laxatives and a new calculator.

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I love alchohol!

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Why did William commit suicide? Because his grandmother had recently died of terminal cancer. His mother left him on the front step when he was two, and moved to Tennessee with her baby daddy.

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An English Grammar Expert writes a very intelligent essay.

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why did the man stay home on a monday? He was dead.

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Two muffins are in an oven. After a set period of time, they finish baking and are enjoyed by the family who had made them. Two weeks later the eldest daughter contracts syphilis thanks to numerous sexual partners. She soon dies leaving her parents and brother depressed. Her brother is kidnapped by a viscous child predator and the mother commits suicide. The father gets a job with the New York Yankees. He is eaten by a genetically modified zebra.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, why the long face. The horse replies, neigh.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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