One time, as a dare, John was forced to eat 5 king size chocolate bars, 3 cakes, 8 Oreo Milkshakes, and 7 packages of Krispy Kreme Donuts. As a result, John has diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Why did the horse say moo? Because it's a cow

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Why did Susie fall off the swingset? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Why did the man with no arms fall of his bike? Someone threw a washing machine at him

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Have you ever tripped over a leaf? No. Neither have I.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

What's red and looks like a bucket? A red bucket. What's blue and looks like a bucket? A red bucket in disguise.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Jane was playing in the back of the bus with an eyeball...up and down,up and down.An old woman asks her : Jane,what are you doing?She responds : I`m trying to see who`s the driver

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Where did the paralytic go for a vacation? No where he can't move.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

If you spell "ChuckNorris" in scrabble, you get 22 points.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Where did Tommy go after the bomb went off? Everywhere

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Jack be nimble, Jack be quick, Jack has a crippling addiction to Cocaine which ultimately led to his divorce and the subsequent loss of custody of his children.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What do George Washington, JFK and Hillary Clinton have in common? They've never been to my house.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What did the stick of butter say to the lemon? "I'm a stick of butter"

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why couldn't the mother make her son's funeral? She died in a car crash on the way there.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Two muffins are sitting in a oven, The other muffin says to the other muffin nothing, Because muffins are unable of human conversation.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

You know what rhymes with sloth? Rape.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why did the piano explode? Beacause someone planted an explosive inside of it.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What happens when you lay a diamond in the water for two hours? It gets wet.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

there were ten in the bed and the little one said roll over so they all rolled over and one fell out then got back up and punched the little one in the face saying good night

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why did the family sue disney? Because at a meet and greet location mickey mouse shot their youngest in the heart.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why is travis so funny? Trick question, He died of cancer 3 years ago.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

A. Big feet, you know what that means B. He has to order his shoes on line because they don't carry his size in stores.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What did the man get on his birthday the week before he died? Obamacare

thumb_up thumb_down +24

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops