Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Roses are Red Violets are blue Shut up I'm watching Re-runs of FRIENDS.

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Yo momma so ugly..... what more do you want

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SQUID DOMINATION!!! Squids WILL Take Over the World!!!

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What did the dinosaur say to the centipede? Its funny cause the dinosaur is big and the centipede is small. Also dinosaurs can't even talk!

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"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Will farrow now gimme your hentai"

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Q.How Do You Make 7 People Laugh? A.Tell Them a Good Joke.

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What's under there? I'm not falling for that one...

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I wonder what mute people say to themselves. :/

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A Jew with a boner runs into a wall, what hits first? His nose

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A man walks into a bar. Three weeks later he gets a liver transplant.

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What is worse than finding dead parents? Not finding them.

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What is worse than stepping on Lego bare foot? Mass genocide.

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What did the archangel Michael say to Jesus? "Hello, Jesus."

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What did the fish say when he ran into a cement wall? ....Nothing fish don't run What did the fish say when he swam into a cement wall? ...Damn

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Why do zebras have stripes? I don't know.

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But there's a sound Dumbledore knows... What does the Fawkes say?

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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A black person and a white person decide to have a race. Who won? The white person Don't be a racist.

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What makes George Michael gay? The fact he engages in sexual intercourse with other men.

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My mom farted, she also has Alzheimer's, I also have Alzheimer's. Also pizza didn't like it

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Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

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A man walks into a doctors office. The doctor says "I've got good news and bad news. Which do you want first?" The man responds "Let's have the good news." The doctor says "I ran a series of tests and found you have leukemia, but your insurance paid for everything." Shocked, the man asks "What's the bad news?" The doctor answers "Your company is switching to a private insurer and because of your pre-existing condition you're being denied coverage. None of your future treatments will be covered."

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How do you poop without it splashing? clench clench, release, clench clench, release, clench, release, clench, release.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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