pleas help someone is in my house i think hes trying to kill me i'm not even joking.

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He did not have sufficient stability in his arm at that moment causing him to loosen his grip and drop his ice cream.

How can humans fly? Well if you run and jump of a cliff...nevermind you would just smash your face on the ground. I guess that isn't technically flying.

Whats faster than a black guy with a tv? His brother who is a dentist and drives a fast sports car.

What do you call it when the Doctor goes back in time to meet himself? A pair o' Docs. What do you call it when Shaquille O'Neil goes back in time to meet himself? Shaquille O'Neil can't go back in time.

Roses are Red I shit in your Stew When you eat it The joke is on you

Guy 1: Why does it smell like a wet dog? Guy 2: Because I smell like a wet dog

What came first... the chicken or the egg? How am I supposed to know?

What's nappy,brown,intoxicated,and stealing my bike? A Blazed, black guy that stole my bike.

Why did the woman leave the kitchen? Because women have the same rights as men thanks to the 19th amendment and sexism needs to die.

whats white and smells like onions? an onion..

What did the red apple say when it saw a black man an irish man, and an asian walk into a bar? nothing apples cant talk.

That would mean that you are not its leader, or that you are, the result would have been the same, if you are the "head honcho" they would have gone for you, and your employees. Now, if you are an employee, they would have gone for your leader, and of course you. So between us and nobody else really its fucking antijoke, are you the leader?

Yo mama's so fat, she died of a mixture of obesity and type 1 diabetes.

Why did Susie drop her ice cream? She was hit by a bus. Knock-knock. Who's there? Not Susie.????

What do you call a dolphin mixed with a cheetah? I have no idea I was hoping you knew.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Pansies are purple, Nothing rhymes with purple.

why did the plane crash? because the pilot was a tomato.

What's the difference between the NBA and the WNBA? What's the WNBA?

So a baby seal walks into a club.

What did Christopher Columbus say to his men before they got on the ship? Get on the ship.

How do you make a drug dealer cry? Just say no

If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be. He could not be. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. He's either in great danger or has a psychological disorder.

Why is Stevie Wonder called Stevie Wonder? Wonder where I am.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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