Roses are red Violets are red I have Ebola

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How do you kill a jew? Same way you would anyone

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What do you call a man with a horse? A man

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Q: What did the two muffins say in the oven? A: OMG we are in an oven, "OMG a talking muffin"

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One a upon of time there was man named Cinderella. He was so mad because his name was Cinderella. The end.

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What's wrong with black people? They tend to make mistakes, as do all humans

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why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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why were the niggas in paris? rhetorical question. everyone knows they aren't french

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Jerry Sandusky walks into an Under 21

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An Englishman, a Scotsman and a Welshman are all in the Great Britain Olympic squad,

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because there were no cars in the way.

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How long does it take for a black woman to have a shit. 9 months.

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Dam. Mothers Against Dyslexia.

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Whats the difference between a penis and a vagina? Pancakes,

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whats the difference between a mexican and a bench? a mexican has elbows.

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what do you get a man with no arms or legs for his birthday? a quick, painless death.

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What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend........... Wiped his ass

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YO MAMA SO SHORT she should really consider wearing long tunic-like blouses, prints that contain vertical stripes, and heeled shoes with a pointed toe in order to create the illusion of length to her silhouette. That having been said, society's limited definition of beauty is quite inadequate for the diverse world in which we live.

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what do you call a middle-aged man with one blue suede shoe on, purple hair, pink skin, white eyes, no toenails, 67 fingers, 1 eye, a pocket watch, no clothes, and 8978967564567898765432345678765321234568909876543w245678909876543456098765323456-0987654367890-098765435678-09876543456789098765432345678909876543456789098765435678909876543234567898765323456890-987654345678900987654323456890987653234567890765434568909876543456899876543456789098765434568909876545678987654345678987654567898765434567898765478579458765456789876543223456789876543098765432123456898765432678987654230987653-098765434567898765434898765434567898765456787654567876 butt cheeks? bob.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are in a terrible ship crash that leaves them stranded on a desert island. All of their survival supplies sank with the boat so they don't last very long.

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A princess kisses a frog to acquire a prince. Then gets arrested for beastiality.

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One day a terribly epileptic child is put on on a strict Atkins diet by his loving mother. A week later he finds that the frequency and intensity of his seizures have been reduced by its ketogenic effects, which provides exogenous fats for the body to burn, but limits the available carbohydrate so that ketone bodies build up. It is the high level of these ketones which appear to suppress seizures.

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Knock, knock. MAN: Who's there? ... MAN: Hello? Anyone out there? ... MAN: Must be the wind.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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