Q: What happens when you throw a glowing purple rock into a bright green stream? A: It makes a splash

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

What happens when Helen Keller plays badminton? She doesn't win because she threw out her back playing Ultimate Frisbee the weekend prior.

What's worse than having a retarded baby? Not having a baby

TWO PADDIES PASS A PUB

Customer: Waiter, waiter, there is a fly in my soup! Waiter: Sorry madam.

What's black, green, and doesn't have to take a shower? I have no idea.

If Tiger Woods is Asian and Black what is he? A golfer!

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse replies, "My wife is dying of terminal brain cancer."

What's better than wining the para Olympics? Wining the Olympics.

knock knock. who's there? interrupting cow. interrupting cow wh... You mom's a whore.

What would u like to drink?

What do you hear when you put your foot on a man's ear? A man saying, "WTF are you doing?!"

What did 4 Year Old Jonny get for his birthday? Death.

Heard about the dyslexic fellow who sold his soul to Santa? That worked out OK, but Christmas was hell.

dont insult justin bieber, she has feelings too!

What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? They're all gone!

How often do you remember a dream? Well what if I told you that this is a dream go ahead pinch your arm. You probably didn't feel pain. And just incase jump out a fifth story window. Come on do it. Now if you are still reading this you are either dreaming or didn't jump out the window. Shame on you!!!!!!

How do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open it up and stick him in. How do you put a giraffe in a fridge? Take out the elephant and put in the giraffe.

What do you call a over weight woman? Fat bitch.

Word Problem Q.John has 32 candy bars. He eats twenty eight of them. What does he have now? A. Diabetes. John has Diabetes.

Fact: When you die, you can't eat ice cream!

What did Big Dog say to Little Dog? "We are both dogs."

How do you get a black guy out of a tree? You don't, he just jumps down.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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