what's the difference between northerners and southerners? southerners live to the south of birmingham, and they don,t stink of urine.

Why wasn't cacto at school that day. Because Silas gave him extreme butthole aids.

Why did the cab driver talk about the Holocaust? Because he began to shart his pants while singing pocket full of sunshine as a royal blue pancake swerved across the terrain.

Why did mallisa get to go to the bar instead of jeremy... jeremy has prostate cancer and he needs to be examined every 2 1/2 minuites plus he's 7 years old.

What do you call a black Decepticon? Niggatron. What Pokemon is black? Niggachu. What lives in the sewers, eats pizza and is black? Teenage Mutant Nigga Turtles. What is Disney's most racist children's book? Winnie the Pooh and Nigger Too.

What's green and eats rocks? A green rock-eater.

How many trees does it take to screw in a light bulb? Trees are incapable of screwing light bulbs

What happens when you get caught inside a tornado? You don't, the debris around you will most certainly kill you before you get close to the tornado.

The awkward moment when you find your wife on the online dating site you are on.

a black guy walks into a store and is caught stealing things the police are called they get there and hes calmly escorted to the police car

Two muffins are in the oven. They don't say anything because muffins can't talk. The end.

Where do babies come from? You fathers penis.

whats worse than a leaf in your bed? World hunger, global warming, the economy......

What has 8 legs and makes women scream? .....Gang rape.

* two sisters are making yo mama jokes* * mom turns around* mom: Hey yo mama so stupid ... sister one: ummmm.... sister two: sure thats not you?

Why did the hamster cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

What is the difference between an Australian and an Ethiopian? One is from Australia the other is from Ethiopa

whats the difference between a brick wall and a jew? jews wear yamakas

How many blondes did it take to screw in the lightbulb? Just one. She did a fine job.

A frog hops into a bar. The bartender asks "What can I get you to drink?". The frog hops out and the bartender realizes he is talking to animals because he has anxiety issues and all of his friends leave him and he spends every night crying and waiting to be loved...so he shoots himself.

A professor of literature asked me, "Young Sir, why are you burning those books?" I replied, "Because I need a fire to cremate the bones of your 3 sisters that I violently raped and murdered" He smirked in a witty and arrogant fashion, until raising his head and saying, "Bond, James Bond" He continued to massage his dick with his own pubic hairs before collapsing and dying

What did the black guy get for Christmas? (In 1938) A bruise from the Klu Klux Klan.

A brunette, a blond and a red-head decide to go swimming in a lake. To prepare, they go shopping together to get some new bikinis. When they get to the shop they are pleased to find that the bikinis are on sale and they get them 50% off. They drive with their new swimwear to the lake and get changed in the changing room. When they get out they notice that it is quite cold. They decide to go swimming anyway. They notice that the lake is dirty. They decide to go swimming anyway. They notice the lake is actually a spill of oil. They decide to go swimming anyway. They remember that none of them can swim. They decide to go swimming anyway. They jump in. They drown.

Mommy how come daddy went to the doctors today? Well sweetie, honestly daddy wanted me to shove things up his ass And I refused to so he went to the doctors so they can do it...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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