knock! knock! who's there? the police, your family died in a car crash!

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What is pink and stuffy? Pink stuff

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer left the gait open.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A fish walked into a bar. Actually it didn't, since fish can't walk.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do you get when you cross the ocean with a dinosaur? Wet.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was dead

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q: What's worse than ten babies stapled to one tree? A: One baby stapled to ten trees.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did the penguin say to the polar bear? Nothing, penguins haven't evolved a complex form of language.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did the boy with AIDS, polio, one eye and one arm get for Christmas? Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's worse than 50 dead babies stapled to trees? 47 dead babies stapled to trees (it's better if it's a nice, round number.)

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A family walks into a talent agency. Talen agent says "Okay, what's your act called?" Dad replies "The Aristocrats!"

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did the homeless man buy with a dollar? Nothing. He didn't have a dollar.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? dead parents.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

what did the lesbian say to the man? I don't like penis

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A blonde and a brunette are walking down a street. What a great way to parade and recognise the various colours that lie upon ones head.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did the kid tell his father? Go away, I'm watching elmo!

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Did u hear about the jew that bought something not on sale? Neither did i.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What happens to a fish with no fin on the right side? It repeatedly swims in a circle.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

I love this website, oh shit *Car* Dead*

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What is green and is not grass A frogg

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because KFC was hiring

thumb_up thumb_down -2

what did one tree say to the other spruce up actually nothing because trees can't talk

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops