Your name is Fired, your Boss comes up to you and says "Your Fired" You say "I know my name." Your boss gets mad and throws you in a chimney

Q-Why the baby drop is lollypop? A: He got hit by a truck

What did the first Ethiopian say to the other? He asked for some food only to realize that the other one had already starved to death.

Q: What do you get when you have water, sodium C14-16 olefin sulfonate, glycerin, disodium lauroamphodiacetate, polysorbate 20, cocamidopropyl, betaine, PEG-6 Phenoxyethanol, PPG-15 Stearyl, Ether, Citric Acid, isocateth-20, Fragrance, Methylparaben, Tetrasodium EDTA, Xanthan Gum, Propylparben, Ethylparagen, and Camelia Sinensis Leaf Extract? A: All New Clean & Clear Oil Free Make-up Dissolving Foaming Cleanser.

A man walks into a movie theater.and attempts to parate a film. He is then caught by employees of the theater and now faces fines and possible jail time for his actions.

The man goes to the doctor after just losing his job because his company went under because of the econmic crisis. His house is being foreclosed because without the money from his job he can't afford to pay for his house. His girlfriend also just left him because of recent conflicts about money and she was looking forward to having a family and with him jobless it was just out of the question. Man:"Doctor I could really use some good news" Doctor:"You have aids"

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE TTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNNNNNSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS I LIKE TRAINS

What's blue, white and red all over? Not a duck.

Roses are grey. Violets are grey. I am colorblind because Iam a dog.

What's fat and round and has a ballsack nose? Mr Chicken

Why couldn't the blonde count to 70? because 69 was a mouth full:)

Apple hates Blackberry.

Roses are red violets are blue I'm gonna rape you with a stick

How many squirrels does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Who cares? Why would a squirrel need to change a lightbulb?

She Explored My Body, Licked, Sucked, Swallowed! When Satisfied, She Left! . . . . Damn Mosquito!!!

What did the robot say to the child? Nothing, the robot malfunctioned and strangled the child.

What did the dinosaur say to the koala? Nothing because the dinosaur is extinct and both of which cannot talk.

Yo mama's so fat that when she goes into a clothing store, she often feels self-conscious about having to buy larger than average clothing sizes than most people.

Why did the middle-aged lady have a heart attack? Years of heavy smoking, alcohol abuse and lack of exercise had taken its toll on her body, causing it to age prematurely. @JWest

whats the difference from a jew and a christian the jew got arrested for rape

What do a raven and a writing desk have in common? I have no idea.

what's funnier then 15? definitely not 14

LOVING BIRD DIEING BIRD DO NOT FLY AWAY

what do you call a girl that just took 15 loads to her face? sasha grey.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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