A man walks into a bar and probably sustains serious head injuries and possibly a concussion as most bars are usually made out of solid metals such as iron or steel and is therefore not permitted by his doctor to engage in sports or other rigorous activities for an allotted period of time depending on the degree of his injury.

How do you find the population of Mexico? Send out a census

an irishman an american and a jihadist get a plane were did they go right through my house

Twitter: @TotalJokes: "So it's been 11 years since the planes hit the world trade centre, time really does fly by."

What do you call 1 black guy and 9 other white guys? Patrick Mills

whatdumb and gay stewart price

EVERYBODY has a penis!!! Everybody!!!!

How many sheets did the Asian want on his bed? "You sheet on my bed I kill you!"

Person 1: have you ever seen Helen Kellers house? Person 2: No i havent Person 1: Neither did she

whats worst than finding a worm in your apple???? an apple in your worm.

Roses are red, Viiolets are blue, Get in the gas chamber, You dirty Jew.

Someone dies every second. That's 60 a minute. 3600 a hour. 86,400 a day. 604,800 a week. 31,536,000 a year. But thankfully- I don't live in Zimbabwe.

Me:hey paul did you see that story on the news? Paul:ya i did thats really crazy!

So, you got to take medications daily or die? Are you in pain my dear?

what's the difference between your grandmother and a dead squirrel? Technically, if you burn them both, your grandmother will produce more ash, but apart from that, they are both useless pieces of carbon.

What's big long, harry, and has glowing eyes? I dont know. Its under my bed. PLEASE SEND HELP!!!

One day Jesus said to John, " come forth and recieve everlasting life." Sadly John came in fifth and won a toaster.

a white man a black man and an asian man had a few drinks at a bar. they all died from alcohol poisoning

whats worst then antijokes? the holocaust

Why a polar bear fell over? He drank so much

What do you call a black man? A normal human being

Why didn't Sebastian get out of the forest? Because he got brutally murdered by a big bad wolf

What is black and white and can't fit through a revolving door? A nun with a harpoon through her back.

Why did the dog have no legs? Because its previous owner had cut them off.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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