Why can't Michael Jackson play chess? Because he is no longer alive.

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Knock Knock "Who's there?" "This is Frank from Walside Windows just wondering if you wou..." (Door Slams Shut) "Damn those people are annoying"..

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A horse walks into a bar. A chicken crosses the road. Humanity is no more. Nature reclaims the Earth.

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Why do white people drive big trucks? 'Cause they can afford it.

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A man walked into a bar. Too bad he didn't see it.The man was sent to the hospital 2 hours later when a friendly elderly lady found him badly wounded on the ground.

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What's small, pale blue and sits at the bottom of the pool? "An over ripe blueberry."

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Why couldn't the little seven year old girl paint her finger nails? She fell in front of a train.

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Q: What's the difference between a polar bear and a washing machine? A: Many things.

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If you dont see banners here it does mean they are not here. P.S Advertising helps fill our pockets and annoy you. Please be understanding in the fact that we will permaban you while grinning if you refuse to UNDER-stand our rule.

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They didn't stop pulling my hair i didn't stop pulling the trigger

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This planking craze is really taking over... my elderly nextdoor neighbour has been planking in her garden for three days straight!

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Why do elephant tusks stick out? For uprooting trees and bushes, and for defending their young.

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How much does a polar bear weigh? About 800 pounds

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why did everyone laugh at the kid in the wheel chair as he entered the room? he was poor

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KNOCK KNOCK whos there Malcom i dont know any Malcom go away!

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Why was the man so angry? Because the woman was not in the kitchen

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How many squirrels does it take to screw out a light bulb? None because squirrels lack the strength and mind set to screw out a light bulb.

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Hey i just met you, and this is crazy, i have amnesia, i'm Skepta

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It's not ok to have intercourse with a woman who say's "No!" But what about "Let go of me!"?

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What do Mike Tyson's handwriting, the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and your Grandma's apple pie have in common? Nothing.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I dont really care anymore BECAUSE I'M SICK AND TIRED OF THIS CLICHE!

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Why did the farmer cross the road? To catch the chicken

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How do u get suzzy off a swing? You tell her to get off

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Knock Knock. Who's There? I don't know. I'm paralyzed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops