What do you do when life gives you Oranges? You make lemonade and life wonders how you did it

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A Rabi, a priest, and a monk all go to different churches because they all have different beliefs an respect each others decisions.

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What's black, white and red all over? A nun that fell down a flight of stairs

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Whats worse than a mother of 3 children, jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car and dieing on impact? A mother of 3 children jumping off a bridge, smashes into the metal roof of a large car, survives,, becomes paralyzed, and has to explain to her children, why she is in a wheel chair for the rest of her life.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a clown, and clowns are scary.

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The motto of those who live in the Bible Belt; "The Bible Belt: Where being obese is 'Genetic' but being homosexual is a 'lifestyle choice'."

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Why did Susie fall off the swings? Because she was hit by a truck.

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Your mother is so fat that when she jumps into a pool, she displaces a proportionately larger amount of water than people with normal body mass indexes or BMI

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Why did the boy get his head slammed in a car door? Because his mother did not love him, and thought it was an appropiate action.

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That awkward moment when you get in the van and there's no candy.

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What do you get when you put a blue bucket in the red sea? it gets wet

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Why was the black guy running away with a sack full of money? He was rushing to local charity to donate the money. It was closing in 2 minutes.

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why didn't sue come to her son's baseball game? because he doesn't play baseball, he lost his arms in a horrible plane crash. besides, sue died in that accident anyway.

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Im Tom and I'm an alcoholic...

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what do you get when you have an albino black man, a lesbian middle eastern siamese twin of the female gender, a polygamist indian and a jewish native american? A very cultured and diversified posse of hostages. Take your pick.

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knock knock? whos there? danielle danielle who? danielle the liar...hehe

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What happens if you fall of a cliff You die

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Why did the catfish cross the road? Catfish can't walk.

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How can you tell if a duck is under your bed? Look under your bed

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Roses are red Violets are blue Hop in the van or I will rape you

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What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? A) The color of their hair.

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How many dollies does little Suzie have? Enough to kill 15 men

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Knock Knock. Who's There? I don't know. I'm paralyzed.

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WELCOME TO THE GARLIC BOYS SHOW! So kids, what are we gonna eat today? POTATOES! FUUUUUUU! Moral: You say tomata, I say WROOOOOOOONG, you say cheap I say your mother.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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