If a tree falls on a deaf person, does anyone care?

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guess what? bannanas

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A guy walks into a bar. He meets a girl and they have a great time. He calls her the next day and their relationship continues for many months. Eventually they get married and have children.

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http://cache.deadspin.com/assets/resources/2008/04/Deer_mating2.jpg

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? getting your ball sack ripped off with a grapple hook

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A man with Tourette's syndrome walks into a bar. Because of his disease, he shouts unexpected profanities across the room, and everybody in the bar bursts into laughter. The man cannot handle the humiliation anymore and goes home. He opens a drawer in his bedroom, pulls out a gun, and points it at his head. His wife walks in on him about to commit suicide. She is horrified. He then looks at her and then down, and he notices his one and only daughter by the age of 7 is by her side. The man ponders his reckless decision he was about to make. Moments later he and his family are holding one another sobbing in each others arms. A few days later the man goes back to the bar and shoots everybody there. Shocked and afraid, he curled up into a ball and regretted his decision. An hour later the police arrived and he was sentenced to life in prison for 3rd degree murder. His wife moved on and started a new family with his former best friend, and his daughter vists him every first tuesday of every other month. The man still suffers from Tourette's and cannot control his ticks and rots in jail. He continues to scream random obscenities for the rest of his life with no parole.

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Why didn't little Timmy see the bus right before it hit him? Because he was blind

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What did the asian say to the President of the United States? I don't speak English

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Knock Knock Who's There? Jehovah's Witness

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Dear paranoid people who check behind their shower curtains for murderers, If you do find one, what`s your plan?

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what do grown up's do at night when everyone lese is asleep? Go to sleep as well

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What did the golfer do on his vacation? He played golf.

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the WNBA.

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If life hands you melons. Your probably dyslectic.

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What did the viking say to the alien? "Vad i namn av valhalla är en utlänning gör här?"

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what's wose than finding a holocaust in your anti-joke? the potential offspring of courtney love and al gore

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? That is not nearly as important as how to cure cancer so let's not worry about it.

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When I see the Viagra commercial telling you about all the side effects and they say "if you have an erection lasting for more than 4 hours, call a doctor." If I have an erection that lasts that long, I'm not calling a doctor. I'm calling my mom; who I always call when I'm sick.

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All of these jokes are about white people

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Q: Why did the baby cry when it came out of the moms stomach? A: The doctor dropped it!

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(To the pretty girl at the bar) "Was your father a thief? Because I really would like to have sexual intercourse with you."

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The Below statement is an antijoke. The Above statement is a joke.

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why is my wife crying? because she doesn't like tomatoes

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How do you make an electrician cry? Kill his family.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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