I'm Donald Trump! Wump wump wump! What's good for the goose Is good for the gander I'm Donald Trump!

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Roses are gray, Violets are gray, I am a dog.

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how do you wake up a cat? you break it.

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one time at band camp there was a guy guess what he played? no one knows

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Sally had no arms. Knock knock. Whose there? Not Sally.

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What do you get if you cross a goat with a horse? Long letters of complaints by animal rights groups

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Why did Bob the Builder die? He had cancer.

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What's in the sky? Is it a bird? Is it a plane? No, it's a helicopter.

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What did the drunk man say to the average civilian? Blahaahahahahahuhuh!

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That made no sense... Did you just call me sugartits Nero? Dont you have a wife?

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What's the difference between a gluten free cereal and a regular cereal? One has gluten, and one has no gluten.

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What's the difference between a Jew and an apple? One of them is a fruit, and the other is not.

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Q.Why did the chicken cross the road? A.The chicken was very distressed and trying to get away from the angry mob that followed close behind it.The chicken was never seen again. If you see a distressed chicken please contact your local police station.

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Why did the boy eat the chips? Because he was hungry

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A man walks into a bar. He tricks a lady into smelling a rag doused with chlorophoam, and rapes her.

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what happened when a chicken laid an egg? it died

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God told John to come forth and recieve internal golry forever. John came fifth and recieved a toaster.

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(sniff) (sniff) It smells like gross diarrhea in here... (sniff) (sniff) ... Yeah it does

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Two muffins are in an oven. After a set period of time, they finish baking and are enjoyed by the family who had made them. Two weeks later the eldest daughter contracts syphilis thanks to numerous sexual partners. She soon dies leaving her parents and brother depressed. Her brother is kidnapped by a viscous child predator and the mother commits suicide. The father gets a job with the New York Yankees. He is eaten by a genetically modified zebra.

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No

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Fine, start by proving to me that you can be a reasonable human being, and I will meet you myself, I have too many of those that rely on my guidance and protection in order for me to send myself off to some suicide mission. Say, are you familiar with the Antony Stark method?

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What do you call 1 black guy and 9 other white guys? Patrick Mills

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What did the chicken say to the duck .... Nothing the chickin was Spanish and the duck was illiterate

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How do you drown a blonde. I recommend that you do not drown a blonde because it is a felony. You could face 30-35 years in prison.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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