what did the boy with cancer want for christmas? a gun

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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Yo momma is so ugly that she should probably consider suicide

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What happens when cole goes into a dark room? It's not possible his hair puts off too much light

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"DUDE! THERE IS A KNIFE IN YOUR LEG!" "SERIOUSLY!"

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What happened to the child drowning in a pool? He was saved by the well-trained lifeguard.

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Cat ate a battery, did volts.

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What did the orange say to the apple? “To be sentient is truly unbearable without sexual organs.”

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Why did a blond killed herself? She couldnt find a corner in a round room.

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What do Kurt Cobain and a whale have in common? Both have holes in the back of their heads

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And riiight after you... Hey its always ladies first.

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What did one door say to the other door? Nothing, cause doors don't talk.

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Laughter is the best medicine. No, Heroin is.

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What's the difference between a bird and a wheel? They both fly, I lied about the wheel.

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Q: What did one Christmas ornament say to the other? A: I didn't know they could talk. Get me that ornament so I can chat with him!

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What did the black person say to the white person I'm black your white

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The man walked into the church and stayed there.

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An old jew, an irish man, and a young mexican woman in her mid 20's are on an island. They eventually become hungry to a extremely ravishing extent. The jew cries out: "I can't take the thought of consuming man, because I am only allowed to consume kosher" The Mexican says: "Alright" The Irishman says: "O.K. Until then lets head over to Timilio's... I hear they are a fine establishment and also serve Kosher meals."

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A polish guy Is sick of being made fun of for his ethnicity, so he decides that he is going to act Italian thinking that no one makes fun of Italians. He stays home for weeks to practice this and one day walks out, up to a store and says"eh, get me some lasagna and zucchini !" the man at the store asks if he's polish.

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how do u make a plummer cry? Kill his children.... :)

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Did you here about the 2 guys who wanted to go to Paris? They didnt go!

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What should you say when someone says a bad joke? I'm sorry, your joke cannot be completed as dialed. Please hang up and don't try again.

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How do you confuse a blonde? You put her in a round room and tell her to find the corner.

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There was a man driving his truck down a dark road, half way down the road he see's a man walking alone. He stops beside him, winds down his window and says "Oi mate, need a lift"? The man replies "yeah sure, but can i sleep in the back of the truck"? The driver replies "Yeah sure" later on as the man is sleeping he hears a big bang. "what was that" the man asks. The driver says "Don't worry i just hit a cow, go back to sleep". time goes by and he hears another bang. "W-what was that". "Don't worry i just hit a moose, go back to sleep and ill wake you when we arrive". Few moments latter he hears a tick tick bang. He gets up and yells "What was that"? The driver replies "Dont worry mate i just hit a aboriginal" The man replies "What was those two ticks before that"?. The driver says "I had to drive through two fences to hit the bastard"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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