I wish there were a city named Sample. So that the sign can say "Urine Sample"

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Whats white and sticky? Glue.

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Q.What do you call a man with no arms, no legs, no head, and no blood in his body? A.Dead.

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Good friends are like snowflakes. They disappear when you pee on them.

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What did the Irish nun say on her deathbed? "I now realize that smoking was an unhealthy habit and I regret that I made the choice to do so." Then she died

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

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What has straight black lines and is square? A refferee.

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a black guy a mexican guy and a puerto rican guy are driving together in a car whos driving? Whoevers car it is.

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A man goes to the doctor. The doctor says "You have to stop masturbating." The man says "What, why?!" The doctor says "So I can examine you."

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How do you stop a little boy from annoying you? You chop his balls of. Why was the little boy sad? Because someone chopped his balls off.

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Your mother is so fat that when she goes to the movies, she usually orders popcorn and maybe a drink.

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Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

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Rosees are red Violets are blue I have schizophrenia and I do too

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Why did the man run away from the cat? He was allergic

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what do you call a black man in the bank holding a bag of money. One wealthy man

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Guy 1: "Smells like UpDog in here." Guy 2: "No it doesnt.."

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What ryhmes with turtle? räpe

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Two muffins are sitting in a oven, The other muffin says to the other muffin nothing, Because muffins are unable of human conversation.

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What kind of horse can do a backflip? No kind of horse.

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Roses are are red Violets are blue I just ate a crockpot!

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You go to the Anti Joke website, what do you find under the "newest" section? Black jokes.

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What does a black man and a monkey have in common? Until February 3rd 1870 neither could vote in America. Monkeys still can't. 

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when life randomly gives u lemons, u should probably have a stand cuz people are gonna expect u to make lemonade

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What's red and can sing? Elmo

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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