A Black guy and a Jewish guy walk into a bar. What does the black guy say to the Jew? "Hi".

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What's the new green? Green

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How do you get a camel out of a desert? a helicopter

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Knock Knock Whos there Cameron oh

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What's worse than your console not switching on? A mutilated body.

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Q: How do you keep a blond occupied for an hour? A: You write "flip over" on both sides of a blank piece of paper.

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whats orange and cant talk? an orange

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Your momma's so fat: She feels uncomfortable in public due to current trends in ideal body shape and aesthetics of beauty.

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If a brick said "hi" what you reply with? Nothing. You can't reply to something that doesn't speak.

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Your Mother is so ugly that men tend to avoid her.

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A man is boarding a plane. The attendant asks if he has a passport. The man says no, and leaves.

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A policeman walks into a pretzel shop. He sees two freshly baked pretzels. One was a salted.

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An Asian walks into a bar. He has a few drinks, but makes sure not to have to many. He then drives home safely, and enjoys a good nights rest.

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Why did the clown fall out of the tree? He got shot.

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What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot you racist! Jk a terrorist

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Roses are grey, Violets are grey, Everything's grey, I'm a dog.

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Sharing means caring, Caring is socialism

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http://cache.deadspin.com/assets/resources/2008/04/Deer_mating2.jpg

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If a tree falls on a deaf person, does anyone care?

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guess what? bannanas

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? getting your ball sack ripped off with a grapple hook

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Why didn't little Timmy see the bus right before it hit him? Because he was blind

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A guy walks into a bar. He meets a girl and they have a great time. He calls her the next day and their relationship continues for many months. Eventually they get married and have children.

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A man with Tourette's syndrome walks into a bar. Because of his disease, he shouts unexpected profanities across the room, and everybody in the bar bursts into laughter. The man cannot handle the humiliation anymore and goes home. He opens a drawer in his bedroom, pulls out a gun, and points it at his head. His wife walks in on him about to commit suicide. She is horrified. He then looks at her and then down, and he notices his one and only daughter by the age of 7 is by her side. The man ponders his reckless decision he was about to make. Moments later he and his family are holding one another sobbing in each others arms. A few days later the man goes back to the bar and shoots everybody there. Shocked and afraid, he curled up into a ball and regretted his decision. An hour later the police arrived and he was sentenced to life in prison for 3rd degree murder. His wife moved on and started a new family with his former best friend, and his daughter vists him every first tuesday of every other month. The man still suffers from Tourette's and cannot control his ticks and rots in jail. He continues to scream random obscenities for the rest of his life with no parole.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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