A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

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What did the kid with cancer get for Christmas? A visit from the Make a Wish Foundation and the opportunity to see her favorite band in concert. Unfortunately, she was very ill from the chemotherapy, and was unable to really enjoy herself at the concert. She passed away several days later, surrounded by family and friends.

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The government makes a good decision

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what did the catholic priest say to the little boy? -probably something about god or jesus because they are in church

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Carlton

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Knock knock Who's there? Adolf Adolf who? Adolf Hitler. Are you a jew?

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How did sally fall off the swings? she had no arms. Knock knock, who is there? Not sally.

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Why did Hitler cross the road? To get to the other side.

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How do you keep a dog from chasing it's tail? cut off it's legs.

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knock, knock, TRICK OR TREAT

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Two men are waiting for the traffic light to cross the road. One looks at the other and says 'Hello!' The other replies 'Hello!'

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What did the alcoholic do when he finished his beer? Opened another one.

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How do you keep children off your front lawn? You molest them.

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Why do Chinese people smell? Because of their ethnicity...plus, they smell.

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A man walks into a bar He has a water, he is sober

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How do you keep a woman entertained? A delightful romantic comedy

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a man eats at a restaraunt alone, because all the people he loved died in a tragic boating accident while he was out of town on a business trip

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What did the penguin say to the polar bear? Nothing because they are on opposite sides of the earth

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar..... Wait..... How?

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A man walks into a bar. Ow!

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What's big? Jupiter.

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A kid is Jackin off and his dad walks in and says if you keep jackin off you will loose your sight. the kid says dad im over here.

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There once was a girl from Nantucket, I've heard its nice there this time of year.

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Q. Why does Hugo masturbate? A. To build muscle.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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