What did Batman say to Robin before getting in the Batmobile? "Get in the Batmobile"

What did the kid with cancer get for Christmas? A visit from the Make a Wish Foundation and the opportunity to see her favorite band in concert. Unfortunately, she was very ill from the chemotherapy, and was unable to really enjoy herself at the concert. She passed away several days later, surrounded by family and friends.

Q: What do you call a unicorn on a mountain? A: Freaking sick.

Knock Knock Who's there? Hodor

What has two wings and a halo? A chinese phone. WING WING HALO?

What's green and wheels? Your mom.

I like to eat.

how do u unload the dishwasher? u take the dishes out!

What did the alcoholic do when he finished his beer? Opened another one.

Why do redheads have red hair Because they were born like that.

Whats white and can't climb trees? A Fridge

Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: It doesn't matter, the lightbulb never went out in the first place.

A man walks into a bar. Ow!

What did the man say to Hitler? You're a douche

Why did Justin Bieber smile in his mug shot? He did not understand the consequences of his horrible actions that could have killed many innocent men, woman, or children and, in jail, there could be very dangerous people living there.

What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong was the first man to walk on the moon, and Michael Jackson was a child molester.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Africa is great, you should get raped

My mother got hammered last night. We cried at her funeral.

What's the opposite of fly? To not fly

Where must you go if you have the desire to eat somebody's face? A psychiatric ward. You are clearly going insane and must seek help.

What did the penguin say to the polar bear? Nothing because they are on opposite sides of the earth

What Do You Call A Japanese Man Humming Classicle Music While Removing Toy Soldiors From His Ear With His Foot Jumping Up And Down On A Large Elephant Strutting About The Universe? Strange.

Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Because he's dead

Q; What smells like chicken, tastes like turkey and looks like duck? A; Nothing...dumbass.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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