A priest enters a bar moments after a young teen walks into the same bar. The priest scolds the teen, warning him of the possibility of arrest, alcoholism, and other bad life consquences. The teen apologizes to the bartender, and much later in life, he thanks the priest.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Q: What happens when two planes both crush a tower in New York City? A: Bad news.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Hey i just raped you and this is crazy so delete my number and keep the baby

thumb_up thumb_down -27

how do you get a cat out of a tree? shoot it

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What's the difference between a duck? They are mostly the same, only one leg is shorter.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Why did Sarah fall of the swing? Because she was very careless and swung too high.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What happens when an alien touches fire? It gets burnt

thumb_up thumb_down -29

what did the alcholic get his children for christman, nothing i lied about the children. Another joke by rangler thumbs up for more.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

A coach walks into the team dressing room at halftime; his team is down 42-0. He screams at the players, "You guys are playing like a bunch of grannies. No offense"

thumb_up thumb_down -29

what is the difference between a blond and a red head? one is has blond hair and one has red hair

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Why couldn't the Joker browse the internet? He was using Compuserve.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

what do you call a ginger......... billy and mickee.......

thumb_up thumb_down -29

I get more excited then my dog when I give her a treat

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Roses are red Violets are blue Im bad with colours Nice T!ts

thumb_up thumb_down -29

why is coltin alexander such a duche? because no one loves him

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What's the difference between a trash can full of dead babies and a Porsche? I don't have a Porsche in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

yo mama is so fat she has to wear large sized clothing

thumb_up thumb_down -29

How do they call a black man that works in a mine. Miner.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

A black man walks into a store and buys a gun based upon the increasing crime rate in his area. He stops for lunch and heads home.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Why did the chicken cross the road? The farmer murdered his family

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad your whole family isn't dead from a fatal car accident?

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What's black, white and sings the intro theme song for "Thomas the Tank Engine" while tap-dancing? There probably isn't anything that does that.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

But I like being mean and angry! Nevermind, 158 according to Mensa`s standard bullshit test (my wife got 160, I remember we argued a lot over it because I kept insisting they would not use the same predictable pattern again... I overestimated them wildly I can make more advanced stuff than they can, and in no way do I consider myself "The worlds elite required to ensue the future survival and salvation of mankind`s finest and fittest" those fucking arrogant suckers,,,) Below average in any test including American presidents and historical events. Aaand about 450 in any bullshit online test which then offers you "more accurate tests" which cost money and probably destroys the fake confidence any idiot buying such a test in the first place might have built up,

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Where did Susie go during the bombings? Susie was wandering around the streets as she felt like she didn't know where she was any more. Everything was burnt to ashes. She came across a man who she has never met. He tells her to follow him. She did.Later, Susie, the mysterious man and a few other people with him were in a private meeting room. The mysterious man tells Susie that he was a Frenchman and he was with the resistance. A few minutes later, the bombs were dropping everywhere. The meeting room was destroyed and Susie, the Frenchman and his men were under attack. The French resistance were about to fight, but retreated - for they were French. Susie was left, lying there as she saw a bomb in the sky about to land on her. She tried to get up and run, but the bomb was too fast. It got her. So yeah. Susie went everywhere, like you lot said.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops