What's the difference between Chuck Norris and Bigfoot? Nothing. Their both really hairy.

why did the guy cross the road? Because he felt like it

What's worse than finding your whole family dead? Nothing. Finding your family dead is terrible.

What do you call a deer with no eyes? A vet.

knock knock. who's there? 9/11

What's the difference between a plum and an elephant? They're both purple but the elephant is gray.

What do you call a horny blond on the corner? A prostitute

What do you call a fart in a box? Your mom's pussy.

An Irishman, an American, an Australian, a Chinese man, a Turk, a Brazillian, a Canadian, a Jew, an African, a German, a Mexican, a Norweigian, a Swede, a Spaniard, a Russian and an Indian walk into a bar.

So a horse walks into a bar, oh wait Sarah Jessica Parker

A man walks into a bar falls into the street and gets run over. It was very tragic

Roses are Red, They are also white, Infact nowadays with cross-pollination a hugely diverse number of different coloured roses are attainable.

what goes in hard and comes out soft? bubblegum, what were you thinking?

Your mom is so ugly, Ew.

Roses are red violets are red I think I'm bleeding It's getting in my eyes

First speaker: "why are there so many anti-jokes about something walking into a bar!?!? Second speaker: "there are only a couple thousand of them." First speaker: "it is getting so damn annoying!" Second speaker: "Well, that's too bad for you" The first speaker proceeds in stabbing himself with a knife while laughing hysterecly. First speaker: "ha ha ha ha" Second speaker "emo."

Why isn't Pluto a planet? Because it mutilated my dog

Why are you a chicken? Because I say cock-a-doodle doo

There are 3 guys, a fat guy, a skinny guy, and sexy guy. They all work together and have lunch together. The fat guy opens his bag and eats a ham and turkey sandwich. The skinny guy opens his bag and eats a tuna sandwich. The sexy guy opens his bag and eats an egg sandwich. The fat guy finishes his meal. The skinny guy saves half for later. The sexy guy ate more than half of his food. A genie magically appears. The End

A black man is driving down the road in a van, and pulls up to a little a girl and says excuse me Miss. The girl replies Ok Ok I will get the car just dont hurt me The black guy says I dont want you to get in my van im taking your mom on a date.

What's worst then leaving a public toilet when you just took a shit and the toilet is now clogged Realising that the maid was waiting for you to get out to clean the toilet...

What do you call justin bieber haveing sex with a lady? A dream

Jesus, Mohammed, and Moses all walk into a bar. They sit down at a table and glare at each other before turning to watch the baseball game. They support opposing teams.

man:"gullible is written on the celling" boy looks up

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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