What has four legs and rocks? Your baby kitten that just got stoned to death.

Two egyptian soccerclubs are playing, what's the score? Over 70 dead

A kid asks his mom: "Mom, what would I be when I grow up?" And so his mother answers: "You won't grow up, you have cancer"

knock knock whos there? i dont know arent you supposed to get the door?

Your mother is so retarded. How retarded is she? Very retarded.

Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

Whats brown and rhymes with snoop? Jay-z

Why was the man arrested? He assaulted and raped an elderly woman at the local Walmart. He then proceeded to hijack the poor woman's Scooter and lead police on a 4 mile long car chase.

What's black and has ne education? A tire.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was suicidal.

What's worse than a pile of dead babies? People that make dead baby jokes.

Why did Susie fall off of the swing? Because she had no arms or legs. Why did Susie drown? Because she fell in a puddle. Knock knock Who's there Not Suzy!

Why do birds fly South in the winter? Warmer, better food sources and therefore greater chance of survival.

What did the man with a colostomy bag say after his home was destroyed in a fire? At least all my shit’s in one place.

Chuck Norris was in a staring contest with the sun. He's blind now.

A brunette, a redhead and a blonde are on the run from the police. They see a barn, and decide to hide inside it. They find three burlap sacks, and each hide in one. The police enter the barn, arrest each of the girls, and sentence them to life imprisonment for murder.

Q: How many chicken nuggets can fit into an olympic size swimming pool? A: 8,563,690,152... Corndogs

roses are red. violetss are black. a knife would go good in your back

How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

Why shouldn't you tell a joke during an earthquake. Cause it is not the time nor the place to tell a joke

Why did Johnathan drop his popsicle? He was hit by a bus. Knock knock? Who's there? Not Johnathan

A man walks into a bar. He is then taken to the hospital for his concussion, seeing as the bar was made of metal

why was the white girl not wanting to have a baby with her boyfriend he was black

What is the difference between a jew and a boyscout? A boyscout comes back from camp.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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