Why did the audience walk out of the movie? Because it had just finished.

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What did the five fingers say to the face? Nothing. Fingers cannot talk.

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So a guy gets drunk and walks into a gay bar by accident He then yells I LOVE PENIS!!!!! everyone yells oh yeaaaaaaaaaa

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Why can't a cat fly Because it doesn't have wings.

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You're tearing apart, Lisa!

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Your mom's so fat that she is going to contract heart disease by age 30.

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What do you call a mix between a mexican and a octopus? Actually, at this moment in time it is physically and morrally impossible to do such a thing. Scientists have yet to find a way to split the genes and create a cross species. lol jk its called a moctapus.

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Q:What's worse than watching the show Jersey Shore? A:Nothing.

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Q. What you call a Guy with no arms an no legs in the water? A. Bob

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What did the kid say when the doctor said he had cancer Oh No

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Everyone believes in something. If you believe "you'll have another drink," you may be an alcoholic.

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Roses are red... Violets are blue... I have Alzheimers... CHEESE ON TOAST

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Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his access to goods and services and his future options from birth.

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How did the corpse cross the road? They can't cross the road they're dead.

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why did bob eat the cookie? because he was hungry

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what did eric foreman get for christmas? a foot in his ass.

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a young mother cow died in a street crossing by a large oil truck, she was never buried and became infested with maggots in the next few days

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RACIST JOKE Why did the racist cross the road? He wanted to get to the other side.

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Why should you be scared when a black man asks you, "What are looking at?" Because if he is over the age of 18, he should know better than to end a sentence with a preposition, unless of course, he never had an education, in which case... you should probably run for your life.

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"Tell me a joke" Tom says Your life.

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Next time someone says "I have mad money"... Say "whys it mad"

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Three blind men walk into a bar, and, no... wait, sorry just one; so one blind man walked into a bar, and... uh, okay, so it was actually more of a small post. This is pretty much just a plausible, yet unfortunate event. My bad.

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A black man, Jew and a Mexican go camping. A bear wanders into their campsite, but upon seeing them runs away because it's afraid of humans.

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Ask me if I'm a human. Are you a human? Yes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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