- Anti Joke

There was a bunch of kids on a bus. One boy yelled "Look a squirrel!" Nobody saw it because he's dyslexic

A duck walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, what can I get you?" He is then checked into the psychiatric ward at the local hospital, for talking to a duck.

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? I shot him in the face.

Mickey Mouse peed on a house what color was it? It wasn't a color, or any pee for that matter. Mickey Mouse is a fictional character for children's amusement.

How do you know that an elephant has been in your refrigerator? The door is ripped off and the refrigerator is lying on it's side. All the shelves are strewn around the floor and your food has been partially eaten or simply crushed. You also have costly damage done to your house and most likely a frightened elephant in your house

A duck walks into a convenience store and asks for a tube of chapstick.He says "Put it on my tab".

A man stumbles into a bar and yells, "Let's get wa-" and falls to the floor dead. The forensic scientists preform an autopsy and find that after 15 years of achoholism and depression caused his heart to stop beating. His family may have mourned his loss, if he had not left them penniless after killing his wife.

What's the difference between a bench and a mexican? A bench is an inatimate object that people sit on and a mexican is a person of mexican descent

How do u kill a gay man? Shoot him in the head

What do u call a matthew vasquez with a guitar, a one man mariachi band... cuz he is mexican

What's sad about this man who committed suicide? He forgot to return his rented DVDs.

Who is the most vile man in Britain? Jerry Carr, the guy who works at the casino.

Big feet on a man means he has, Nothing, a man's foot size has no relation to the size of his penis.

A horse walks into a bar. The horse says "why the short face?"

What do you do if your walking into a room full of Lions and Jaguars? You stop walking.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

There was a bunch of kids on a bus. One boy yelled "Look a squirrel!" Nobody saw it because he's dyslexic

Little Brianna has a special body part. That's why I kidnapped and sexually assaulted her.

What did the kid with no legs get for Christmas? A Pogo Stick

Yo momma so fat she couldn't even fit in a house

What do you call a man who's a gynecologist, painter and respected martial arts champion? Talented.

What did the black kid get for Christmas? An X-box, a sweater and some socks.

sweating like antoni with a girl

Why did Johnathan drop his popsicle? He was hit by a bus. Knock knock? Who's there? Not Johnathan

Q: What is brown and sticky and often found in the grass? A: A stick.

A man is on a military operation, he dies and has a funeral.