A Catholic Priest, an Anglican Priest, and a Rabbi were in a train carriage together because they got a package deal to go to a conference on religious tolerance. Good for them.

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Liars go to hell! -God

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CHEEZECAKE

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Johnny just finished his pie.

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There was a buffalo on a farm. The buffalo was slaughtered and then put and a package and sent to people who like the taste of slaughtered, chemical filled buffalo. In other words, people who like buffalo wings.

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How do you kill a blonde? I don't. Murder is a crime.

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Yo momma is so fat, she has to wear a large shirt

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why did my girlfriend fail her test? she was pregnant :'(

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Chuck Norris can fly around the world in under 2 days. In an airplane.

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I'm on the seafood diet, a large proportion of my daily food intake consists of fish.

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A man was drowning in a lake and so he asked God to save him. A man on a boat came by and said to the drowning man "Do you need any help?" The drowning man said "Yes! Thank God a boat came for me!" So the man on the boat pulled the man from the water and saved him.

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a duck walks in to a Chinese restaurant and they cut his head off

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Hey, come here often? No.

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Hi Danny it's Louis Tehe

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Nobody knows. Chickens aren't capable of knowing why they do things.

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What did Niel Patrick Harris do after coming out of the closet? He grabbed his jacket and went for a delightful stroll in the park.

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How do you stop the neighbors kids jumping your fence and stealing your lemons? Molest them.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One muffin says to the other, "Boy, it's hot in here!" The second muffin replies, "Yes, I'm in a lot of pain. Also, I've had a headache for quite a while now. I went to the doctor last Thursday and he preformed an X-ray but the results are not back yet. This extreme heat is likely worsening my already fragile physical health."

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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What has 4 eyes, but can't see? 2 blind people.

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what is the worst thing in the galaxy? runing out of dr.pepper :(

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad I didn't say mustache? ...No. I wish you had said mustache.

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What did Bobby get for Christmas? Nothing, Bobby is an orphan and has no friends.

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Jesus said unto John, "Come forth and receive eternal life." But, John came fifth and won a toaster.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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