Person1: Man I had the worst day ever. Person2: Worser than the holocaust.

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drugs sex and alchohole are yumme as AIDS

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Neither have I, nobody knew him.

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what do you get if you cross a motorway with a wheel barrow? Arrested as a wheelbarrow is not a motorised vehicle, or even a vehicle at all and therefore it is an offence to cross the motorway with it, actually it is probably an offence to cross a motorway with anything now that I come to think of it

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yo mama is so fat, when she stepped on the scale it said, 200 l.b.s

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How do you make a fat man cry? You call him fat.

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What's blue and white and can't climb a tree? A fridge in a denim jacket!

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What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa? Tiger woods is a famous golf player and Santa is a fictional old man dressed in red and white who is said to live in Lapland, have an airborne sleigh driven by eight magical reindeer and come down the chimney to fill childrens' stockings on Christmas eve.

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why was the black mans shirt ripped? because he escaped genocide in africa

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Suzie.

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I worship you Nero, and I wont even begin to explain myself why.

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Why didnt the boy go to school the next day? Because he killed himself due to bullying

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RIDE A PONY, RIDE A PONY

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A man and a woman are having sex. The man finishes and says, "Oh, God, I hope you're on the pill." The girl says she isn't and begins to cry. Lacking a job or a stable life, the man leaves the woman. The woman has an abortion and suffers irreversible damage to her ovaries.

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A man walks into a sofa. BANG

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Ms Leong Sux

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A man walks into a barbershop. He gets a crew cut and leaves.

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Henry's mom packed Henry sweaters And lots of things besides sweaters Henry went to war He saw lots of gore Logically, he wouldn't need a sweater because he had to wear his uniform during the battle. Did i mention that Henry likes chocolate?

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Roses are red, and blood is too. But violets are purple. NOT FUCKING BLUE.

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what do you call a guy with no arms or legs and wearing red and white in the ocean? a dead person and someone needs to call the cops cause thats terrible.

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One kisses says: I have had 3 bottles of water today and I haven't peed yet. His friend says: O you probably have a urinary track infection.

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What is older than history?

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So a train conductor is going at 70 mph to to a destination 50 miles away. He goes over 3 hills, one at 20 mph, the other 42 mph, and the last at 63 mph. he crosses 2 bridges at 47 mph each. What did the train conductors mom eat for dinner that night Nothing she had cancer and died.

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What's worse then mud on your shoes. Being assassinated by means of a dart to the throat.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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