Guy: I have a gun get in my van Girl: SHOTGUN!

Why did the monkey fall off? It had no more lives. Why did the second monkey fall off? I dunno. Why did the third monkey fall off? Since the second was unknown, the third does not exist. Why did the little girl died? It's pretty obvious.

2 guys at a funeral. "did you know the girl?" asks one of the guys. "No" replies the other. "Me neither."

What do you get when you put a baby in a blender New Doritos Dip

What did the alcoholic Indian do? Continued to drink and further worsen his people's stereotype.

What do call a black politician? Not Barack Obama, unless it's Barack Obama

What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? dead parents.

a chicken and a rooster walk into a bar. and then walk out because a bar is no place for a chicken and a rooster.

Roses are red Violets are blue I like your mom Give me some glue

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

what's worse than failing a test? having your house burnt down

Two elves walk into a bar. The hobbit laughs and walks under it.

How do you help someone stop drowning You take your foot off the back their head.

Knock knock! Who's there? ... There was no reply because the person who knocked was the mailman delivering a package, and he had a tight schedule so he couldn't stay around to chat.

really? are people insistantly so totally stupid? Now read that again and you may notice something. :P

Richard Gere has a girlfriend called Goldie

Q: Why do Mexicans love rice and beans? A: Because it's fairly easy to grow in places with relatively low rainful and high temperatures like that in which they live in.

What is the opposite of Obama? Mitt Romney because he his white and a republican so all is good with him.

Yo mama so fat she runs the risk of stroke, heart disease, or diabetes

What's green and blue, and red all over? Nothing. It if were red all over it wouldn't be green and blue.

Your father must be an alien because he's driving a UFO

Knock knock. Who's there? Just use the peephole. I am.

What did the black girl say when sho dropped her phone? Oh crap, I dropped my phone.

My mom farted, she also has Alzheimer's, I also have Alzheimer's. Also pizza didn't like it

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...