Why couldn't the kid get into see the pairate movie? It was rated PG-13 and he was only 11. Plus he had no money and his mother didnt want him watching movies like that.

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How do you kill a blonde? There are a variety of methods, but I prefer a fine mix of insecure clowns and pepto-bismol.

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RACIST JOKE Why did the racist cross the road? He wanted to get to the other side.

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A man walked into a bar, He then realised that he was likely to become the butt of a joke quite soon and subsequently left to take his kids to the park.

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A priest enters a bar moments after a young teen walks into the same bar. The priest scolds the teen, warning him of the possibility of arrest, alcoholism, and other bad life consquences. The teen apologizes to the bartender, and much later in life, he thanks the priest.

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How do you make a gorilla stop chasing you? You shoot him.

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What did the father give to his daughter? AIDS.

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What is long and painful? It's a sword, get your mind out of the gutter.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why not?

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I want some pudding. but I didn't have my meat. how can I have pudding?

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What did the retarded guy say to the other retarded guy? Youre Retarded

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If you see a person falling down your balcony, Say cya later!

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What did the teenage boy do when his mum was out shopping? Finish his homework.

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Theres an irishman , scottish man and a welsh man on a plane they where going to france

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Me:hey paul did you see that story on the news? Paul:ya i did thats really crazy!

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What do you call an asian that is black? Please tell me, I was asking a question.

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What's brown and white all over? Chad butthole

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While running away a burgular cut his hand on a piece of glass. He fell to the ground bleeding like crazy. What did the police say when he saw the burgular? You've been caught red handed.

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Why was Reed sad? His mother has a penis

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Why are black people like jelly beans? Nobody likes the black ones

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We are not even in the same country, and my eye becomes infected two times a minute or something so I wont be going anywhere. I mean, if you are some guy trying to be a girl in order to screw with me, let me first of all thank you for our exchange of ideas and concepts, and then say that if you are a guy, that likes other guys, then... Well, lets just say that if you are a man, that I don`t speak with men in general, takes away time I can spend with the ladies.

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A man approaches an attractive young woman at a party. He asks her if a rag smells like chloroform and proceeds to hold the rag up to her face. She passes out, the man takes her into a nearby bedroom and rapes her. He casually leaves the party. He will most likely continue this vile act for years to come.

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Man: Doctor doctor I feel like a pair of curtains........ Doctor: You clearly have Alarming mental issues perhaps a psychologist would be the right person to discuss this matter further

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your momma so fat.... that as she walked by....... i missed 3 commercials

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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