A duck walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender realizing this is an odd situation, seeing that ducks cannot articulate the English language, realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and turns to tell his wife about the dream, but she won't respond. He then realizes how his marriage is in shambles...

your a vagina says you, your a booby

Why did the man trip over the kitten? He was blind.

MURRRY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

what do you call a girl that just took 15 loads to her face? sasha grey.

Two men walk into a bar and begin ordering drinks. Both men engage in polite conversation with each other. At the end of the night they each take taxi's home because they realize the potential risk they pose to others if they drive intoxicated.

What's worse than aids? Being a virgin.

i dont fisish anythi

whats the same between a mouse and an elephant? They are both small except for the elephant

Why did Bob scream "Nurrrrrrrrr!!"?.....because he was mentally challenged.

A guy went to McDonalds and asked for a cheeseburger: —Can I have a cheeseburguer? —No

What's blue, white and red all over? Not a duck.

What did the doctors tell the boy with cancer who is on his way to being released from the hospital? "you are going to die," why give him hope and be proved wrong. This way if they are wrong the whole situation is a miracle, if they are right..... "I told you so"

Confucius says, I hear and I forget. I see and I remember. I do and I understand.

You had better thumbs up this post.

what's better than being stabbed in the testicles with a biro? the Silversun Pickup's album Neck of the Woods

What's the difference between a bench and a mexican? A bench is an inatimate object that people sit on and a mexican is a person of mexican descent

Why do Jews have such big noses? They don't; To suggest phenotypic variation along religious lines is preposterous.

Poop

Q: Whats more funny than a pile of dead babies? A: The one in the center eating its way out

why couldn't the girl watch t.v? Because her house burned down

why barack obama sad he realized the 4 trillion dollars of debt wasn't going be solved by borrowing more money

What do you say to a corpse? How's life?

What happen when the man preposed to his girlfriend? He regretted for the rest or his life.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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