knock knock WHO'S THERE?! ARE YOU A SEX CRIMINAL?! NO ONE WANTS TO DO THAT TO YOU MUM!

Why did the chicken cross the road? Scientists are still unable to fully understand the brain functioning of chickens enough to comprehend their motives for doing such a thing.

Why did the little boy cross the road? He didnt, he got hit by a car and died

Two black guys were walking down a street to meet up a local drug dealer. Turns out the black guys were undercover cops who arrested the drug dealer and both recieved awards for finding the criminal.

Why didnt the vampire have a reflection? You have to be real to have a reflexion

whats the best part about ebola? nothing ebola is a dangerous virus

A white guy, a black guy, an asian guy, an indian sit together. Canada

It was a boys birthday, his mom died of cancer, his dad of aids, and all of his siblings were put in a gas chamber. Happy Birthday

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding worms in your stool.

What do airplanes and trees not have in common?? Bananas

Q. What did the girl on drugs get for Easter? A. Down Syndromes Disease.

A pirate walks in to a bar. The bartender notices he has a steering wheel in the front of his pants, so he says to the pirate, "you know you've got a steering wheel in your pants, huh?" The pirate responds, "Arrrrrrrrr, it's for me carrrrr."

What breaks when you give it to a baby? Its pelvis

why did suzie fall off the swing? she had no arms why did suzie get hit by a bus? she was blind knock knock whos there? not suzie.

I was going to tell a joke about your mom's vagina, but that's overused.

how do you make a plumber sad? tell him to pull up his pants

Confucius says... The superior man, when resting in safety, does not forget that danger may come. When in a state of security he does not forget the possibility of ruin. When all is orderly, he does not forget that disorder may come. Thus his person is not endangered, and his States and all their clans are preserved.

Where is boots, Dora asks Why the hell are you asking me when your the one who is with him.

What's funny about Magic Johnson's T-Cell count? Nothing. He has AIDS, and it's a degenerative disease, that will eventually result in death. There's nothing funny about that.

How do you get a clown off of your property? You ask him politely to get off and if he doesn't, you should contact the authorities immediately.

Why is it a bad idea to stand in a thunder and lightning storm with a metal rod? Because you will get wet from the rain.

So yesterday i walked into a bar, so what?

5 black men walk into a 7-11 at midnight. They clog the all of the toilets in the mens bathroom causing them to over run.

What did the lawyer say to the doctor? - I am a lawyer and you're a doctor.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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