What do you get when you cross a Lion and a Shark? You would likely get trouble, seeing as its both animals are quite dangerous and crossing even one of them is ill advised.

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Relax and enjoy sugartits, you see, I left a last chance for you to shut down the function yourself, when you really want to end it sugartits, you can just read and focus on what I am calling you, sugartits, it really insulted you at first sugartits, but do you see it? Have a nice night sugartits, I mean I sleep like half a hour luckily because of hypnosis and the time control and you know stuff that sounds like its from Sonic or you sugartits. But I gotta go dear sugartits, you want to hypnosis to end, you make it happen by focusing on what I am calling you here.

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What did one muffin in an oven say to another muffin? Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects thus incapable of sppech.

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Why did the boy get his head slammed in a car door? Because his mother did not love him, and thought it was an appropiate action.

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What do you call someone who thinks they're funny but in reality isn't? Adam chapali Knock knock Who's there? NOT adam chapali

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Why can't Scrillex fish? Because He is too busy to practice fishing.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because it was in the oven because the farmer was cooking it for dinner.

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Roses are red Oranges are orange Nothing rhymes with orange Forever alone

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Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

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why did the child kill his mother because the child gave his mom AIDS

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A deaf man walks into a bar. A few minutes later, cops come in and takes the poor man into the cop car and takes him downtown to the precinct for booking. Meanwhile, back in the bar the deaf man drinks his beer and converses with the bartender in sign language.

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Q: Why did the man have sex with Amanda Seyfried? A: Are you kidding me?

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what do you call a mexican with a rubber blanket cold

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Q: What's worse than ten babies stapled to one tree? A: One baby stapled to ten trees.

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Why did the butcher have blood on his hands? He murdered his daughter.

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Camon is to Jerry Sandusky as Cole Ryder is to Will Higgins!

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A woman walks out of the kitchen.

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Knock Knock Who's There Mailman Mailman who? Sir, I don't have time for this, take your mail.

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You go on Nero, he got all red, not sure if he is mad or ashamed or both, but we can all tell that man is jealous. Employee.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have PTSD. Time to kill myself.

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Why does the Green Giant's vegetables taste funny? He stands over his peas and corn.

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whats the difference between a black and a bunk bed? a bunk bed can support 2 kids.

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Why are there so many smiths in the phonebook? Because they all have phones.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Doesn't matter. He was hit by a semi truck.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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