I took my sick iguana to the Vet. He said why did you bring him to me, a former soldier?

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A man dies and goes to heaven. This is an assumption based on religious faith.

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Q: how do you test the sharpness of a knife A: stab someone MR

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Not gonna tell you, that was one weird story, I feel like super high right now.

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Why couldn't Ariel talk in the Little Mermaid? Someone slit her throat.

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Q: What does a really poor kid say to his friends? A: I hate over working for 75 cents an hour...

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What did the sea say to the penguin? Nothing it just waved..

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Q.How many blonds does it take to change a light bulb? A.1

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WITH YOUR RED THUMBS COMBINED! I AM CAPTAIN MORAL! You: GOOOOO (AWAY) MORAL! CAPTAIN MORAL MAN, IS A HERO, GONNA TAKE GREEN THUMBS RIGHT BACK TO ZERO... Moral: Okay that is all I remember about the Captain Planet Theme song... GIVE ME RED THUMBS MUAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA! PS: Redhead, three months have passed (more or less) I wont call you because we agreed you would get of this fucking place, but I can visit you if you are a good little girl! And yeah I am calling you Red, Tifa just reminds me of Final Fantasy and your big bosoms so yeaaaaah get your little red haired cunt over here so we can chat yes?

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What did Steven Hawkings say as he fell down the stairs? .................

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how many black guys does it take to screw in a light bulb?................ we dont know because u cant c them

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Whats red and has wheels? An apple, I was just kidding about the wheels.

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Why do dinosaurs have no friends? Because they are all dead

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i am 26 why was i kidnapped 13 years ago cause i was in a badly written play

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Why did a white man get kicked out of the Olympics 2012¿ Because he did not have down syndrome

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Knock Knock, Who's there? Banana. Banana who? The Holocaust.

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Q:What's worse than watching the show Jersey Shore? A:Nothing.

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Why did the boy fall of his bike? Becuase he was hit by a couch.

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whats does a dog cat spider and rat have in common?the dog cat and rat are all mammals.Exept for the rat idiot!!you should have figured THAT out before!!!

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Why did the elephant climb the tree? Because he didn't want to tie his shoe.

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Roses are gay, Violets are gay, I f*cked your mom You have aids.

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Hey i just met you and this is crazy but your adopted banana

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The Blonde walked into a wall.

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One linners President Kinnedy did you like the parade President Lincon did you like the play

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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