whats long, orange, and comes out of brown stuff? -a carrot.

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Knock Knock Who's There Fat white lady with dreadlocks Fat white lady with dreadlocks who? want to buy some girls scout cookies?

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What's orange and sounds like a parrot? An orange parrot.

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where does al queda go on a business trip the twin towers

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Knock Knock Whos there? John John Who Tic Tic BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMM

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Knock Knock Who's there? Yes.

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I remember the last words my grandpa said before he kicked the bucket. I bet I can kick this bucket. He missed and had a heart attack.

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Why did the water in the lake disappear? There was a toilet at the bottom.

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there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

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Why did the kid drop his football? He had a heart attack

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Don't you hate when you finger your belly button and your nipples exploed?

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What do you get when you cross an African, a white person, an Asian and a Spaniard? Society's worst nightmare

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Womans baksetball...

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What do you call cheese that's mine? My cheese

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A man and a six year old boy are walking along a path through the woods on a moonless night. "Gee mister, I'm scared!" says the boy. "You're scared?" says the man. "I have to walk back alone!"

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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People Eating Tasty Animals

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A horse walks into a bar... The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have testicular cancer........"

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Yo mama so fat that when she jumped into a pool she displaced more water than someone who was of a normal weight

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;iub

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Stolen property that you should return immediately because the consequences of shop-lifting can prevent you from getting a good job and might land you in prison.

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Q; What is green and eats rocks? A; The green rock eater... Q;What happens when you through a rock straight up in the north pole? A; The green rock eater eats it..

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What's green and can read your mind? Nothing. Some people thinks the answer is a plant but don't listen to them because they are wrong.

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How many blondes did it take to screw in the lightbulb? Just one. She did a fine job.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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