"I had the worst day ever!" "Was it worse than 9/11?"

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue It is Valentines Day So I had to get them for you or we would get into a big fight, which will end up with me on the couch.

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knock, knock no one answers man goes home and shots himself because he feels alone

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A man was drowning in a lake and so he asked God to save him. A man on a boat came by and said to the drowning man "Do you need any help?" The drowning man said "Yes! Thank God a boat came for me!" So the man on the boat pulled the man from the water and saved him.

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A jew walks into a bar. The bartender says "get out you jew!" The bar tender apparently was a Nazi.

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Two jews walk into a bar. They laugh over a beer and leave

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How do you stop the neighbors kids jumping your fence and stealing your lemons? Molest them.

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"So, how's life in North Korea?" "Well, I can't complain."

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All dead all doom or all dead? How can you choose the question doesn't make sense. dead all dooom ohhhaklsdjfla;ksdjfal;skfjasd

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Knock Knock Who's there? Dave Dave who? Dave's crying because his grandmother has alltimers and now can't remember his name

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A rat scurries into a bar. Six days later, all of the people in that bar die of bubonic plague.

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what is the worst thing in the galaxy? runing out of dr.pepper :(

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What do you call a Mexican mixed with a platypus? a pineapple

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Carlton

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The government makes a good decision

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I was walking on the beach when I heard a man yell "Help, Shark, Help!" and I laughed, because I knew the shark wasn't going to help him.

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Why is the sky red in London? Fire.

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Two men are waiting for the traffic light to cross the road. One looks at the other and says 'Hello!' The other replies 'Hello!'

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Why do Chinese people smell? Because of their ethnicity...plus, they smell.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Interrupting Cow. Interru--- MOO! I'm so sorry, I have Tourette's Syndrome and cannot control these sudden outbursts. Please continue.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Africa is great, you should get raped

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a man eats at a restaraunt alone, because all the people he loved died in a tragic boating accident while he was out of town on a business trip

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How many jews do you need to change a lightbulb? -One.

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A man walks into a bar. Ow!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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