Two guys were sitting in a pub.

A hiker gets lost on a trail and ends up wondering deep into the woods. He comes upon an amish farm. He knocks on the door and an amish man answers. The hiker explains his predicament, and the amish man says "sure you can stay in barn, but promise me one thing, don't have sex with my daughter". The hiker says "of course I won't". He then goes to the barn. Right before the hiker falls asleep. The amish farmer comes in and says "make sure you don't have sex with my daughter". The hiker says "of course not". So the next morning the hiker is rested, well fed and is about to leave when the amish man approaches and says, "Thank you being decent and christian like."

Why did Justin Bieber smile in his mug shot? He did not understand the consequences of his horrible actions that could have killed many innocent men, woman, or children and, in jail, there could be very dangerous people living there.

What does AIDS stand for? Acquired immune deficiency syndrome

Brett Farve

My mother got hammered last night. We cried at her funeral.

Why did the man break into the bank? Because he was a bank robber

Why so serious? Why bad grammar?

Why did the mexican cross the road....... To find work so he can support his starving family

Roses are flowers jordan does it for hours xxxxif ya know what i mean

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side why didnt the chicken cross back? for the first time in his life, Clucky the chicken, felt liberated. his cruel life flashed before his eyes, forcing him to remember all the bad tines he had spent on the McKinley farm. all the eggs stolen from him, watching all his friends being taken for slaughter. it all came back. from the other side of the road, Clucky saw a place he never wanted to go back to, a place he wanted to forget. the day he chose not to cross back was the first real day in Clucky's life.

What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? One walks on the moon and the other f*cks little boys.

What Do You Call A Japanese Man Humming Classicle Music While Removing Toy Soldiors From His Ear With His Foot Jumping Up And Down On A Large Elephant Strutting About The Universe? Strange.

What's harder than nailing seven dead babies to a tree? My erection while doing it.

He do you get an emo kid to stop cutting himself? Take away his knife.

Q: What do you call a group of asians riding their bikes while carrying large bags of merchandise filled with an ample amount of video games? A: Obviously, a few enviromentally-friendly entrepreneurs who managed to make enough of a profit via their established buisness to the extent that they could buy what they required and get some other desired items as well.

How do you make a grilled cheese for a black guy? Butter two pieces of bread, place two slices of any kind of cheese in between the pieces of bread, then fry it in a pan with butter.

Q: What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? A: They're all gone!

What did the man say to hitler? hi hitler.

Why did the little boy drop his ice cream cone? He was hit by a bus

I got shot, you laughed

A priest, a Rabi, and a Monk walk out of the bar and go home.

What did the American call the Arab? Nothing the American could not talk because he suffered from throat cancer because of the effects of 9/11 and thus causing his hatred towards Arabs and led to the Arabs death. Green

Q. How many ADD kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A. Lets go ride bikes

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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