What do you call a calculator without a brain? A calculator.

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what do you call a old guy who touches children? my dad

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What do you call a guy sleeping with little boys? Michael Jackson

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why barack obama sad he realized the 4 trillion dollars of debt wasn't going be solved by borrowing more money

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What do you get if you cross a sheep with a kangaroo? Don't be ridiculous. First of all, scientifically this is near impossible and secondly, what use would a kangaroo with wool be? Sheepdogs would become obsolete and they would be a nightmare to shear. Imbecile.

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Your city streets are so bumpy that cars get flat tires when going to the gas station.

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Why did the kid drop his ice cream cone?? Cause he got hit by a bus.

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Kanye West walks into a bar. As he is a very popular celebrity, he is recognized instantly. The patrons mob him, asking for pictures and autographs. He is in a pleasant humour that evening, so he indulges them. Some laughs are had, he buys lots of drinks, and takes home two beautiful women. Such is the life of a celebrity. ...but that still doesn't make him happy.

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What did the fish say when it swam into a wall? "shit"

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A horse goes to the mall and when he is in the checkout line there is a man at the cash register the man at the cash register says "Why the long face?" and the horse replies "hey buddy, watch it!!!!!!!"

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Why couldn't billy hear his mom on the phone? Because Billy is deaf.

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A Irish leaves and bump in to a really tall the Irish sorry boss

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What's worse than the holicost? The ninja turtles

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Why did a girl get an STD? She had sex.

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HAVING OTHER LESBIAN'S OVARIES C AUGHT A AROUND U MBRELLAS SITTING TREES

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Why did Elsa go into hiding. She died

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Why shouldn't you try to pick up a live scorpion with your teeth? Because it could easily sting your face, or mouth.

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what do you call it when everyone becomes tolerant about gender identity. whatever pronoun it prefers.

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What do elves get for Christmas? Overtime.

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Chuck Norris farted and... several people looked around uncomfortably, not knowing how to react to the embarrassing situation.

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How do you get Jake snow to shut up? Say shut up

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What's worse than a dead baby? A dumpster full of dead babies What's worse than that? One is still alive at the bottom What's worse than that? It had to eat its way out. What's worse than that? It came back for seconds

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

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A white player in the NBA. Wait...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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